[Living Document] Marketing errors.
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[Living Document] Marketing errors.
I'm going to continue complaining about ads, so maybe let's just compile all of the complaints in here.
To start off, I'll list my top three, and we can add to and reorganize the list as needed:
I'll do it in reverse order, for a specific reason:
#3. "Hey look, we have non-traditional relationships in our ads! Buy our shit!"
#2. Nouns as verbs.
#1: The way this broad says the word "Kraft". My wife doesn't understand this, but when the ad starts, I hope Quint comes in and interrupts with his fingernail routine, which is a massive upgrade. Selective misophonia, perhaps, but every time I hear it I literally shoot myself in the face with a shotgun. You tell me, do you hear what I'm hearing? Are you right now shooting yourself in the face with a shotgun? "Kraft". Oh god.
To start off, I'll list my top three, and we can add to and reorganize the list as needed:
I'll do it in reverse order, for a specific reason:
#3. "Hey look, we have non-traditional relationships in our ads! Buy our shit!"
#2. Nouns as verbs.
#1: The way this broad says the word "Kraft". My wife doesn't understand this, but when the ad starts, I hope Quint comes in and interrupts with his fingernail routine, which is a massive upgrade. Selective misophonia, perhaps, but every time I hear it I literally shoot myself in the face with a shotgun. You tell me, do you hear what I'm hearing? Are you right now shooting yourself in the face with a shotgun? "Kraft". Oh god.
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.
- Flack
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
Jesus, they almost got three syllables out of that thing.
If I'm allowed, I'd like to add "celebrity endorsement." Tom Selleck is best known for playing in Magnum P.I. Having a soothing demeanor and a sweet mustache does not make him an expert on reverse mortgages. This goes for the opinions of professional athletes and musicians, too.
If I'm allowed, I'd like to add "celebrity endorsement." Tom Selleck is best known for playing in Magnum P.I. Having a soothing demeanor and a sweet mustache does not make him an expert on reverse mortgages. This goes for the opinions of professional athletes and musicians, too.
"I failed a savings throw and now I am back."
- Ice Cream Jonsey
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
The fact that they are using that song in the Kuh-raf-tttt ad, which has been memed to hell, is the most pandering shit I've ever seen.
the dark and gritty...Ice Cream Jonsey!
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
Let's all once again enjoy the official video of this thread:
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.
- Flack
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
"Brought to you by plastic bottles of vodka. When gravity is stronger than your will to stay sober, buy plastic bottles. Available now in your local liquor store. Possibly on a really high shelf because, hey, they're plastic!"
"I failed a savings throw and now I am back."
- odyssia76
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
Yeah but her bewbs are bouncing and they are playing Enya! I wonder if her not wearing a bra was a subtle attempt at sex appeal in a Kraft ad LOL.pinback wrote: ↑Sun May 16, 2021 6:35 pm #1: The way this broad says the word "Kraft". My wife doesn't understand this, but when the ad starts, I hope Quint comes in and interrupts with his fingernail routine, which is a massive upgrade. Selective misophonia, perhaps, but every time I hear it I literally shoot myself in the face with a shotgun. You tell me, do you hear what I'm hearing? Are you right now shooting yourself in the face with a shotgun? "Kraft". Oh god.
128 char limit on sigs? Srsly? SO lame.
- odyssia76
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
They also weigh a lot less than glass! No as good in a bar fight though.
128 char limit on sigs? Srsly? SO lame.
- AArdvark
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
Wow, Enya sold out to Kuhrafft. How sad. Also, is it ok to chase your kids around the house with food? I'm going to do that with some Czechoslovakian sausage.
Re: grandpa drinking. I want to be that guy when I retire!
THE
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AARDVARK
Re: grandpa drinking. I want to be that guy when I retire!
THE
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- Tdarcos
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
To misquote Alex Murphy in Robocop, "Buddy, I think you're full of shit."
"I have head her word with unmistakable clarity."[1] It's the goddam manufacturer's name, for crissakes! Of all the things they might get wrong, the name won't be. She pronounced it "crafht," the same way I would. To quote my new roommate Leslie Rouse, "What do you want, blood?"
- - -
[1] The movie Used Cars had a scene where it quoted one of President Carter's speeches, where he said, "I have heard your words, with unmistakable clarity."
"I really feel that I'm losin' my best friend
I can't believe this could be the end."
- No Doubt, Don't Speak
I can't believe this could be the end."
- No Doubt, Don't Speak
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
Cheery millennials using inappropriate superlatives:
Carvana has an ad with some cheery, chirpy bitch letting you know that they have a squad of customer service agents at the ready to "make your experience incredible!"
There is no planet in any galaxy in the universe on which the experience of buying a car, no matter how it's done, is ever "incredible".
Carvana has an ad with some cheery, chirpy bitch letting you know that they have a squad of customer service agents at the ready to "make your experience incredible!"
There is no planet in any galaxy in the universe on which the experience of buying a car, no matter how it's done, is ever "incredible".
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.
- odyssia76
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
What if there's a planet where they use oral sex as a car sales method?
128 char limit on sigs? Srsly? SO lame.
- AArdvark
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
I do not believe that is a realistic scenario.
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
I think that's a good analogy for what's going on except the customer is doin the suckin. "Yes, I accept your lies, gobble, yes give me the undercoat protection, slurp"
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
Other than her being really bizarre looking, and the words coming out of her mouth are so ridiculous, she has the most annoying voice I can currently recall.
Of special note, the way she pronounces the words "food", "stomach", and the all-time worst: "culprit".
https://www.ispot.tv/ad/o_Hr/everlywell ... hering-you
Of special note, the way she pronounces the words "food", "stomach", and the all-time worst: "culprit".
https://www.ispot.tv/ad/o_Hr/everlywell ... hering-you
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
I mean what is WRONG with this thing!?
I don't have to say anything. I'm a doctor, too.
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
Also make that an avatar.
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Re: [Living Document] Marketing errors.
"I failed a savings throw and now I am back."
- AArdvark
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