Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

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Flack
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Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

Post by Flack »

Our movie begins in a world where people know that both King Kong and Godzilla exist. King Kong has been contained on (I think) a simulated version of Skull Island. A young deaf girl has made friends with Kong. Godzilla has not been seen in three years. Suddenly, Godzilla emerges from the ocean to attack a specific research company. BUT WHY?

Now it's time for talky-talky. Why has Godzilla done this? How long can we contain King Kong? Talky-talky.

King Kong ends up sedated on a barge ship, where he is being transferred to a hole that leads to "hollow earth." Before they arrive, Godzilla shows up. Boom, pow! It's great! It's Godzilla vs. King Kong! It's kick-ass city!

More talky-talky. Bad scientists reveal another threat. Good scientists talk about hollow earth. A third group of people consisting of a conspiracy podcaster and two kids run around, trying to solve a mystery (I'm not sure what it even was).

Then, Kong explores hollow earth, and declares it "home." (Oh, Kong knows sign language.) He beats up some dragon dinosaur thing. It's great! Kick, punch, smash!

Talky-talky. Where is Godzilla going? What has Kong discovered? What are the bad guys planning? A lot of people say insightful things like "what's happening?" and "get out of here!" and "oh my god!"

Kong and Godzilla end up in Japan for the third round of ass kicking. I hope some engineers and construction workers survive the attack because they will be rebuilding Tokyo for the next 1,000 years.

AND THEN SURPRISE MONSTER SHOWS UP. The deaf girl tells Kong what to do. Nobody tells Godzilla what to do. It's time for MEGA ASS KICKING FIGHT WOWIE ZOWIE SMASH CRASH DOUBLE SPLASH!

Then some more people talk but unfortunately don't explain the plot, which is okay, because nobody cares.

I watched this in my home theater and the bass coming from King Kong's stomps almost knocked my television off the wall. This will be the movie people use to show off their A/V setups in the future. "Hey watch this stomp stomp pow booooooom!" Just don't accidentally show any of the scenes where people are talking.

This is the greatest movie that I have no idea what it was about. A+!

Funniest line of the movie:
"How's Kong with heights?"

Second funniest line of the movie:
(Kid trying to hack into a computer system)
"I'm not used to this! I'm used to pirating movies online!"

There were half a dozen intentionally funny lines and at least 50 unintentionally funny ones.

"Creatures, like people, can change."

"Jack Flack always escapes." -Davey Osborne

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Flack
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Re: Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

Post by Flack »

I was talking to my dad about this film over the weekend and he told me that he thought Godzilla was way larger than King Kong, so I looked it up. In the original 1933 version of King Kong, Kong's height varied throughout the film. It's estimated that Kong was just under 20' tall while on Skull Island, and grew up 25 feet while terrorizing New York City. Four decades later in the 1976 Paramount remake, Kong more than doubled in height at 55' tall. In Peter Jackson's 2005 remake, Kong shrunk back down to his original 25' (ish) foot stature. Then, between that movie and Kong: Skull Island, Kong somehow quadrupled in size to a massive 104' tall. If you thought that was big, you don't know much about Godzilla, because in the new film, the two creatures see almost eye to eye. It is estimated that in Godzilla vs. Kong, King Kong is 335' tall, compared to Godzilla's almost 400' height.

To put things in perspective, the new King Kong would be about 1/4 as tall as the Empire State Building (without the top spire), and about 30' taller than the Statue of Liberty.

"Jack Flack always escapes." -Davey Osborne

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Re: Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

Post by AArdvark »

I was going to ask a couple things about this move, now that it's been watched and (I guess) there aren't any real spoilers. The original Godzilla was sort of a cautionary tale about the dangers of nuclear testing in the post WW2 era and the Kong 1975 has a sort of an ecology exploitation vibe. Does this movie have any of that stuff? I have the feeling it's just a big-budget wrestling match with random dialog.

I feel everyone is about the same size now, could the Cloverfield monster get involved in this franchise in the future? Maybe they can have a tag team with Jet Jaguar, Kong, Godzilla and the Cloverfield monster.


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Re: Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

Post by pinback »

You mean John Goodman?
In the yard, not too far from the car.

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Re: Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

Post by Flack »

AArdvark wrote: Mon Apr 12, 2021 4:29 pm I was going to ask a couple things about this move, now that it's been watched and (I guess) there aren't any real spoilers. The original Godzilla was sort of a cautionary tale about the dangers of nuclear testing in the post WW2 era and the Kong 1975 has a sort of an ecology exploitation vibe. Does this movie have any of that stuff? I have the feeling it's just a big-budget wrestling match with random dialog.
it is a big-budget wrestling match.
AArdvark wrote: Mon Apr 12, 2021 4:29 pmI feel everyone is about the same size now, could the Cloverfield monster get involved in this franchise in the future? Maybe they can have a tag team with Jet Jaguar, Kong, Godzilla and the Cloverfield monster.
According to Wikipedia, the Cloverfield monster is 1,200 feet tall. Even in this current MonsterVerse, that's 4x taller than these guys.
"Jack Flack always escapes." -Davey Osborne

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Re: Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

Post by Jizaboz »

Only the Japanese do Godzilla correct. Hell, they even still used models and dude in a suit combined with CGI in their later films!
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