The last time I got promised a soul-sparing, I woke up to a wereboar gnawing on my throat, demoncock in places no good demoncock should have even thought to go without internet access and an AOL account, 5 babyskulls set at suspiciously pentagram-like angles around my body and a woefully bloodstained riding cloak, which, to this day, the drycleaners will not work on without a $50 deposit.

You just can't trust Necromancers.

I bought a couch yesterday. I was assured that the movers would be able to get it through the door, but what if they start taking a hammer to my front door to get it in? What then?

That transaction is/was not "risk free."

If Mr Isioma can promise a risk-free transaction, then should we really be making fun of him on this BBS? Should we?

Let's ask Dead Silent Slumber, currently playing here at work at AMD.

"Heading for death! Meet the void beyond the gates. Forever burn in the purgatory. Bloodcurdling whisperings from your lungs, throat and lips -- take my hand and I'll spare your soul!"

I think that sort of says it all! Trust in God -- and Nigeria -- will get us through this day. Thanks, DSS!

From: "prosper isioma" <p_isioma@123.com>
To: <p_isioma@123.com>
Sent: Tuesday, September 30, 2003 3:14 PM
Subject: BUSINESS


> WE ARE MEMBERS OF A SPECIAL COMMITTEE FOR BUDGET AND
> PLANNING OF THE FEDERAL MINISTRY OF WORKS AND
> HOUSING(FMWH). THIS COMMITTEE IS PRINCIPALLY CONCERNED
> WITH CONTRACT AWARDS AND APPROVAL. WITH OUR POSITIONS,
> WE HAVE SUCCESSFULLY SECURED FOR OURSELVES THE SUM OF
> THIRTY ONE MILLION, FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND UNITED
> STATES DOLLARS (US$31.5M). THIS AMOUNT WAS CAREFULLY
> MANIPULATED BY OVER-INVOICING OF AN OLD CONTRACT.
>
> BASED ON INFORMATION GATHERED ABOUT YOU, WE BELIEVE
> YOU WOULD BE IN A POSITION TO HELP US IN TRANSFERING
> THIS FUND (US$31.5M) INTO A SAFE ACCOUNT. IT HAS BEEN
> AGREED THAT THE OWNER OF THE ACCOUNT WILL BE
> COMPENSATED WITH 20% OF THE REMITTED FUNDS, WHILE WE
> KEEP 70% AS THE INITIATORS AND 10% WILL BE SET ASIDE
> TO OFFSET EXPENSES AND PAY THE NECESSARY TAXES.WE
> INTEND TO USE PART OF OUR OWN SHARE TO IMPORT FROM
> YOUR COUNTRY AGRICULTURAL AND CONSTRUCTION MACHINERY.
> THIS IS BECAUSE THE PRESENT GOVERNMENT OF MY COUNTRY
> IS EMPHASISING ON PROVIDING FOOD AND HOUSING FOR ALL
> ITS CITIZENS BEFORE THE NEXT ELECTION. HENCE,
> AGRICULTURAL AND CONSTRUCTION EQUIPMENT ARE IN HIGH
> DEMAND OVER HERE. WE SHALL ALSO NEED YOUR ASSISTANCE
> IN THIS REGARD ON A COMMISSION TO BE AGREED UPON WHEN
> WE FINALLY MEET.
>
> ALL MODALITIES OF THIS TRANSACTION HAVE BEEN CAREFULLY
> WORKED OUT AND ONCE STARTED WILL NOT TAKE MORE THAN
> SEVEN (7) WORKING DAYS, WITH YOUR FULL SUPPORT. THIS
> TRANSACTION IS 100% RISK FREE.
>
> IF THIS PROPOSAL SATISFIES YOU, PLEASE REACH US ONLY
> BY EMAIL FOR MORE INFORMATION.
>
> AWAITING YOUR URGENT REPLY.
>
> MARTINS IBILLO.
>
> ____________________________________________________________
> Charle con sus amigos online usando CHAT 123 http://www.123.com/sp/chat/section.php?id_section=329
>
> ____________________________________________________________
> Charle con sus amigos online usando CHAT 123 http://www.123.com/sp/chat/section.php?id_section=329
>
>
...
The fuck?