Vitamins and the NWO

by **Worm** » Fri Jan 23, 2004 5:33 am

Jonsey: Seriously, what the fuck are you doing talking about UO? Didn't you play it for a month? I mean you *could* get a job or some shit, though you also could just murder people with jobs for their money. I mean, sure it is a stupid little fucking game, and this freeshard may not really remake the whole experience of UO. All of that aside though UO was possibly one of the few MMORPGs that really presented a great experience.

It treated characters effectively like in game monsters, you had no rights only the rights you could make for yourself. You COULD make a town if you wanted and people COULD tear it apart, none of that shit was planned, it just happened. It would be better if people RPed a bit but still the game has enough unexpended potential to bust the Hoover Dam open.

by **bruce** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 3:32 pm

Jethro Q. Walrustitty wrote:Y'know, merely for historical purposes, "Visicalc" was around in the late '70s.

Visicalc and Lunar Lander both appeared in 1979. Which almost certainly means that Lunar Lander was under development before Visicalc was generally available; I say let's call it a tie.

Bruce

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 11:31 am

Vitriola wrote:Good thing nobody gets paid to raise princesses for potential realm-unifying marriage. Then where would you be?

They don't anymore, they don't.

It's really quite simple. The best games I have ever played deal with volunteer work. Ironic, because in real life, I hate to volunteer.

1) Zork I -- It's a game about getting treasure. In somebody's house. No, you can't quite get paid to do that! LOL!

2) X-COM -- Assembling a squad of humans to drive off aliens, research new weapons, manage a budget, keep international opinion of you high... nah, not this one either.

3) Duke Nukem 3D -- One guy blowing shit up, no. If you're an actor this can be your job, but Duke ain't acting.

4) Knight Orc -- Revenge is a dish best served cold. And without pay.

5) Doom -- Hell, the guy in Doom doesn't even get paid. He just wants to go home. (For all the good it did him, see DOOM II: HELL ON EARTH)

6) Bomberman -- I only wish that you could get paid for lobbing bombs at people.

7) Front Page Sports: Football 96 -- Technically, football players DO get paid. But I don't know if it's really a "job." Besides, my love for this game went far beyond what the average NFL athlete engaged in.

8) The Bard's Tale -- Assemble a band of d00ds and kill a wizard. NOT a job.

9) Civ II -- Hm... Technically, not a job, because the game spanns thousands of years.

10) Jailbait on the Interstate: Nah, not a job, Tracy was just trying to get home.

The proof of the love is in the sliding of the glove. I rest my case, senators.

by **Vitriola** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 11:10 am

Good thing nobody gets paid to raise princesses for potential realm-unifying marriage. Then where would you be?

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 11:04 am

Jethro Q. Walrustitty wrote:Wait, he said things people are paid to do. OK...
Racing sim? Good.
Hairstyling sim? Bad.

Right. I can take my Neon out and race it against somebody to the next red light. I do not get paid to do that. (This is aside from the fact that GTA:VC pretty much ruined racing games for me, because now it's not enough just to race a computer opponent, I want to be able to drag them out of the car and double-tap them afterwards.)

Hairdressing, lunar landing, tax management, UO (where you need to get a job to get money in the beginning) being "a lawyer" (like in those shitty Law & Order games) -- fuck that.

by **Vitriola** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 10:49 am

I downloaded Fatal Relations onto my other computer. I should really play that when i get it out of storage. Not that I couldn't get it from Kazaa as easily here, too.

I don't suppose anyone out there ever downloaded and/or burned the last 2 seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, did they? I haven't seen a single episode since ep. 16 of season 5, and I'm really sick of avoiding hints as to what happened. I have waaay too much anime on this computer to start getting them myself, and I don't think they're out on dvd yet.

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 10:35 am

Lysander wrote:Wait, what? You can't get volumes of content off so now then, because Pinback, being the egotistical fuckwit that we all know he is, took down his entire site just because no one visited it. Am I right? Did I miss anything here? Is there, like, a hidden serial number I can use to access the hidden reems of CONTENT!?

Nah. I was just taking a random potshot at a guy who currently has no goddamn web presence.

by **Jethro Q. Walrustitty** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 8:58 am

Y'know, merely for historical purposes, "Visicalc" was around in the late '70s. I think there was a "Bank Street" spreadsheet as well, as well as plenty of others.

Just because MS Excel wasn't around, doesn't mean that no one had come up with the idea of a spreadsheet before.

I think Jonsey needs to clarify his opinions a tad more. Some games based on what people do in real life can be good. Some not.

Racing sim? Good.
Toenail clipping sim? Bad.

Wait, he said things people are paid to do. OK...
Racing sim? Good.
Hairstyling sim? Bad.

Somewhere I have a Hentai game where you have to make some tied-up chick cum by poking her in the tit with a syringe and injecting some fluid. Really, it's wasn't as good as it sounds. I also nabbed "Do You Like Horny Bunnies?" recently but I certainly don't expect much from it.

by **Lysander** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 8:49 am

IceCreamJonsey wrote:If I wanted to fucking read volumes of content tonight I would have gone on
www.sonowthen.net .

Wait, what? You can't get volumes of content off so now then, because Pinback, being the egotistical fuckwit that we all know he is, took down his entire site just because no one visited it. Am I right? Did I miss anything here? Is there, like, a hidden serial number I can use to access the hidden reems of CONTENT!?

by **Lex** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 1:36 am

I do.

/sticky

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 12:33 am

Vitriola wrote:No, this would be the hentai dating sim. Too bad you couldn't deathmatch that shit online, I'd leave you in the dust with my 1337 romantic skillz.

This thread needs more

1) Someone tossing the salad with a copy of this hentai dating game.

2) Facials

I DON'T CARE WHICH

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Thu Jan 22, 2004 12:33 am

bruce wrote:So, senator: does Crazy Taxi suck?

Yes.

How about John Elway's Football Sodomy 2005?

Actually, John Elway's Quarterback DID suck. They made it back when he was getting blown out of Super Bowls by 30 points. It was terrible.

Custer's Revenge??

Waitasec, I don't think it was his JOB to... Jesus, it wasn't, was it?

Thanks for making me look up the life and times of General Custer. If I wanted to fucking read volumes of content tonight I would have gone on www.sonowthen.net .

by **bruce** » Wed Jan 21, 2004 10:07 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: It's some guy at NASA's job to land lunar objects. Ditto with getting a dragster working. When it becomes someone's job to shoot rows of aliens out of the sky then maybe my opinion of Space Invaders will change.

So, basically, any game which represents something an actual person is paid to do sucks? Is that your contention?

So, senator: does Crazy Taxi suck?

How about John Elway's Football Sodomy 2005?

Custer's Revenge??

Bruce

by **Vitriola** » Wed Jan 21, 2004 7:54 pm

No, this would be the hentai dating sim. Too bad you couldn't deathmatch that shit online, I'd leave you in the dust with my 1337 romantic skillz.

by **itgirl** » Wed Jan 21, 2004 7:04 pm

Vitriola wrote:I need a copy of True Love.

The movie about the wedding? The only memorable quote is "I mean, they pee through that thing!"

by **Vitriola** » Wed Jan 21, 2004 2:34 pm

I need a copy of True Love.

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Wed Jan 21, 2004 2:07 pm

bruce wrote:I mean, Jesus Christ, how can someone actually think this? Lunar Lander is a really GOOD game. It's easy to understand, easy to land the ship a couple times, and really hard to master.

Yes! Yes, the senator from Missouri. Go right ahead.

The basic gameplay can be summed up in a sentence: "Gently land the craft on the moon."

And that's crappy. "Shoot all the giant bugs." Cool. "Blow up all the asteroids." Keen. "Get your naked latina across Interstate Zero." Aces.

But what the hell is landing a craft on the moon? Come on now! That's not a game. Aside from it's attempts at ignoring the pass-fail ramifications inherent within (any landing on the moon in 1969 or whenever the "game" first appeared is a good one) it's something which gets glossed over in another game.

If the ENTIRE bit of your game can be ignored in another game (i.e., Space Quest and/or Starflight and/or a million other space games just pop you from the ship to the planet) then you don't have good gameplay.

A good game about landing a ship is Planetfall.

The bad way to do it is Lunar Lander.

And the excreable way to do it is to slob together Gravitar.

Note that I'm talking about the First Atari Vector Game. Not the text only variations, which are indeed spreadsheet games, but, hey, imagine this: BEFORE SPREADSHEETS

Well, sure, but still. Not by much. Lotus 1-2-3 was around in the early 80s.

BASIC LUNAR LANDER V1.2 wrote: ALT: 287.9412 VEC: 349.2275 FUEL 2258.332
T? 49
V? 4.5

Ah-hahaha!

Let me guess: you don't see the attraction of Dragster ("Get down the track as fast as you can without blowing your engine") either, right?

Not my thing, no.

And I guess Space Invaders ("Don't let those fucking aliens land!") doesn't work for you either, right?

An ENTIRE game of shooting aliens? I'm all for it.

I don't know how you equate the two.

It's some guy at NASA's job to land lunar objects. Ditto with getting a dragster working. When it becomes someone's job to shoot rows of aliens out of the sky then maybe my opinion of Space Invaders will change.

by **bruce** » Tue Jan 20, 2004 5:36 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: Let's get something straight. Lunar Lander barely qualifies as a "game." It's something that mathematics nerds did because they had no artistic flair and couldn't draw anything more complicated than a triangle on the screen. It's spreadsheet gaming if you want to call it that.

Your crack rock is crying for its mommy.

I mean, Jesus Christ, how can someone actually think this? Lunar Lander is a really GOOD game. It's easy to understand, easy to land the ship a couple times, and really hard to master. The basic gameplay can be summed up in a sentence: "Gently land the craft on the moon."

Note that I'm talking about the First Atari Vector Game. Not the text only variations, which are indeed spreadsheet games, but, hey, imagine this: BEFORE SPREADSHEETS and no worse than, well, the rest of that ilk. Not a game like:

BASIC LUNAR LANDER V1.2 wrote: ALT: 287.9412 VEC: 349.2275 FUEL 2258.332
T? 49
V? 4.5

but an actual video game. Just so we're clear.
Let me guess: you don't see the attraction of Dragster ("Get down the track as fast as you can without blowing your engine") either, right? And I guess Space Invaders ("Don't let those fucking aliens land!") doesn't work for you either, right?

Sheesh.

Bruce

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Tue Jan 20, 2004 4:18 pm

cbczxiufhoife wrote:
Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Put some fucking effort into this. I'm not going to write your posts and mine from here on out.
poop

lollr

by **Ben** » Tue Jan 20, 2004 3:37 pm

Yes, Worm?

Vitamins and the NWO

Post a reply

Expand view Topic review: Vitamins and the NWO