The Top Ten Games I Should Have Had on the List

by **Worm** » Fri Jan 11, 2008 4:55 pm

Yeah, once I abandoned the bathroom it was pretty easy.
However the FINAL level is the coolest idea ever made into fucking reload RELOAD RELOAD RELOAD bullshit. I enjoy this game but I fucking hate Edios for it. For every fucking ounce of strength they put into RUINING what is probably the only good stealth franchise that EXISTS.

Seriously it's disgusting, they're just bad people.

by **AArdvark** » Fri Jan 11, 2008 2:26 pm

Whats wrong with that? If I remember Hitman, it's about deciding who will live and who will die. Muscle flexing in a bathroom = quick death.

THE
GOD LIKE
AARDVARK

by **Worm** » Thu Jan 10, 2008 11:33 pm

Again the game manages to piss me off. At the start of the mission you can get one target in a bathroom that has an adjacent place to hide his corpse. However this is a higher level, so the hiding area patrolled (you cannot just prop him up on the toilet, weak). Beyond that, there is a civilian who will literally walk out of the bathroom to the soda machine, stand there for two seconds, then walk back to the bathroom take a piss, and fucking FLEX in front of the mirror for about thirty seconds. Thusly making eliminating the guy early completely impossible.

My solution now? Go to the bathroom, put a fucking bullet in the brain of the guy who wanders around, put a bullet in the brain of my target, and go clean up the rest.

by **Worm** » Thu Jan 10, 2008 8:56 pm

Yeah, I've just learned the joy of pushing people down the stairs. It's like I thought I was so clever strangling everyone.

Steam seems like a good option, but I think I'm going to go with the boxed Hitman Trilogy just so I can AVOID playing Codename 47, which I remember as very horrible.

by **hygraed** » Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:06 pm

by **hygraed** » Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:00 pm

Worm wrote:What would I think of Hitman 1, Hitman 2, Codename 47, or Contracts?

Hitman: Codename 47 is the first game in the series. I would avoid it; it's buggy and the controls can be frustrating. Pretty much every aspect of the game has been improved upon in later entries to the series.

Hitman 2: Silent Assassin is a lot of fun, and can be had for pretty cheap on Steam. The controls are a lot more intuitive and the missions are, on the whole, far more satisfying, although there is still a fair amount of walking long distances.

Hitman: Contracts is a reimagining of the first game, but with the engine and control improvements of the second. It's also really dark and creepy, which you may or may not enjoy. I loved it, personally, but I'm a fan of that sort of thing anyway (Clive Barker and whatnot).

by **Worm** » Wed Jan 09, 2008 2:31 pm

Kill porn producer and governor's violent son? Specialist again!

by **Worm** » Tue Jan 08, 2008 10:00 pm

hygraed wrote:That's only five, so I am going to add Hitman: Blood Money and Fallout 2.

I got Blood Money on the 360. It's pretty neat, open, and fun. However my interest drops proportionally to how good the missions are.

I went from Ghost Killer to Hoodlum in the span of a few missions because they went from "kill child molestor while he does opera" to "kill three assassins before they kill another asshole during mardi gras". That last one was compounded by the fact that the police are guarding the bars the guy will snipe from, and you need to do an unnecessary pain in the butt outfit change. Also I didn't know the walkie talkie gave me a radar blip for the assassins.

Both Agent 47 and myself are getting tired of the game. We've been out in the cold too long. We want out.

What would I think of Hitman 1, Hitman 2, Codename 47, or Contracts?

by **AArdvark** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:36 pm

The only reason I even mentioned Bagman is because I saw it once and only once in my life for about three weeks. Then it disappeared and I have never even thought of it until last week. The game kind of sucked. No, it actually sucked hard. One of those quarter sucking machines that don't give you that feeling of accomplishment like other games from that era.

I would not like Bagman to be on the list.

THE
CLARITY AND
EMPTY POCKETS
AARDVARK

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 4:34 pm

hygraed wrote:For what it's worth, it took me three tries before I could get past the first couple of missions without getting bored, and I would now consider it my favorite game ever.

Right on - this is exactly how I felt. If it's just a couple missions, I may bear down and try to complete them and get to where the fun is. But yeah, it's crazy that a game with this good a rep has such a terrible beginning.

by **hygraed** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 3:53 pm

For what it's worth, it took me three tries before I could get past the first couple of missions without getting bored, and I would now consider it my favorite game ever.

Unfortunately I can't find a guide with good screenshots; the only one I can find with any screenshots at all is this one, and they're sparse at best. I do urge you to keep trying, though; the beginning can be somewhat tedious but it really picks up around Hell's Kitchen.

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 3:43 pm

hygraed wrote:You might have already justified its non-inclusion, but just in case I nominate Deus Ex. That game is seriously just so good and so fun the entire way through.

I have attempted to start Deus Ex a half-dozen times. I just cannot get into it, or get past the beginning. Each time I get a little farther, but I just can't understand what is going on or what I am supposed to be doing.

Worm and I have had some chats about it. I admit that the problem is with me, because everyone else in the world seems to have enjoyed it just fine.

The last time I played I installed the new texture pack, which worked great. I got past the first part where everyone is shooting at you. I came across a machine that stops you from progressing in a hallway. There is a force field or something, and a forklift. I am not sure if it's a jumping puzzle or what.

I'll tell you what, I'm on vacation for the next two weeks. If someone can point me to a walkthrough with good screenshots I'll give the game another try. I certainly couldn't find anything that helped me the last time I picked the game up.

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 3:40 pm

AArdvark wrote:Anyone ever hear of Bagman?

Some kind of jailbird run away from the law while collecting bags of loot. It may have been my imagination but I used to play it a lot at the corner pizza joint. Why wasn't that on the list?

Bagman is a nice game, but my understanding is that it becomes a drag once you sort of learn the patterns and tricks. Plus, it has a mine cart. Mine cart levels unfortunately became an enormous cliche over the years.

It's a fine game, there's nothing really wrong with it, I just don't think it can squeeze out any of the other games on the list I made.

by **hygraed** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 1:16 am

You might have already justified its non-inclusion, but just in case I nominate Deus Ex. That game is seriously just so good and so fun the entire way through; it's one of only two games I have wanted to replay immediately after completing them (the other being Soldier of Fortune but it's not nearly as good).

by **AArdvark** » Thu Dec 13, 2007 5:33 pm

Anyone ever hear of Bagman?

Some kind of jailbird run away from the law while collecting bags of loot. It may have been my imagination but I used to play it a lot at the corner pizza joint.

Why wasn't that on the list?

THE
LIVE OR MEMORWRECKED
AARDVARK

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Wed Dec 12, 2007 10:14 pm

If you look at the order of arcade games, it goes something like Robotron, followed by Ms. Pac-Man and then Gauntlet II. That is truly fucked up and probably utterly senseless. Gauntlet II is good, but it ain't that good. On the other hand, if we ever had to do the Underground Railroad again, Gauntlet II would be the most important arcade game, because it could easily fit thirty or forty runaway slaves.

I'll keep everyone posted.

by **hygraed** » Wed Sep 26, 2007 1:48 pm

Yes. You can just wander around the levels (like an opera or a house party) at your leisure, casually shooting, anesthetizing, or strangling anyone you imagine looked at you funny. And then you can haul out your .45's and blow everyone else away.

Or you can quietly walk out.

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Tue Sep 25, 2007 11:06 pm

hygraed wrote:Well, uh... in the sense that each of your targets is a character, I guess 10 since the whole point of the game is to kill all of them. You can also choose to kill nobody else, everyone else, only people with red shirts, only blonde people, or any other arbitrary category you can come up with.

I am actually, I am sad to say, pretty ignorant of the entire Hitman universe. Does this have sandbox-type stuff where you can kill anyone at any time? I know I could wiki this stuff, but I hate not conversing with people because of that goddamn encyclopedia.

That was one of the things I liked about Postal 2. Actually, for people who have not seen it, here is the review I wrote about Postal 2: http://www.caltrops.com/review0018.php

But it was nice to just go off on any character in the game. That's why I disliked it so much, because it could have been a great game.

... er, but yes, this Hitman game does sound promising, and I appreciate you bringing it to my attention.

by **hygraed** » Tue Sep 25, 2007 11:03 pm

Well, uh... in the sense that each of your targets is a character, I guess 10 since the whole point of the game is to kill all of them. You can also choose to kill nobody else, everyone else, only people with red shirts, only blonde people, or any other arbitrary category you can come up with.

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Tue Sep 25, 2007 10:01 pm

Let me ask you this: I hate characters in video games. How much, on a scale of 1-10, will I be killing video game characters in this?

The Top Ten Games I Should Have Had on the List

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