by Flack » Mon Aug 31, 2009 8:35 pm
So this is as good a time as any to tell this story.
One day in our old house, my wife lit a candle and put it on the coffee table. I was sitting on the couch with my feet resting on the edge of the table. I was wearing socks. Out of the blue, my wife says, "OOOOOH NO, don't even THINK about it!" Then I said "What are you talking about?" and she said, "you were thinking about setting your sock on fire."
Now to be 100% honest the thought had NEVER even crossed my mind until after she said it. Then I was like, "well shit, maybe that would be super awesome or something, why else would SHE have thought of it?" So when she wasn't looking I scooted my sock mostly off the end of my foot and put it in the candle. All of a sudden -- WOOSH! Yeah buddy, foot funk burns real good.
So all of a sudden I start yelling "MY BISCUITS ARE BURNIN" like Yosemite Sam and my wife is calling me a dumb ass and yelling at me. So I flick the sock off and it lands on the carpet and starts burning. So THEN I grabbed one of the couch pillows and squashed the teeny-tiny flame, but not before leaving a burn mark on both the carpet and the couch. The carpet was repaired as described above -- we cut a small square out and replaced it with another small patch (I think we got it from a closet corner). The pillow was always burned which pissed my wife off to no end because we just bought the couch and the pillows matched.
So this is as good a time as any to tell this story.
One day in our old house, my wife lit a candle and put it on the coffee table. I was sitting on the couch with my feet resting on the edge of the table. I was wearing socks. Out of the blue, my wife says, "OOOOOH NO, don't even THINK about it!" Then I said "What are you talking about?" and she said, "you were thinking about setting your sock on fire."
Now to be 100% honest the thought had NEVER even crossed my mind until after she said it. Then I was like, "well shit, maybe that would be super awesome or something, why else would SHE have thought of it?" So when she wasn't looking I scooted my sock mostly off the end of my foot and put it in the candle. All of a sudden -- WOOSH! Yeah buddy, foot funk burns real good.
So all of a sudden I start yelling "MY BISCUITS ARE BURNIN" like Yosemite Sam and my wife is calling me a dumb ass and yelling at me. So I flick the sock off and it lands on the carpet and starts burning. So THEN I grabbed one of the couch pillows and squashed the teeny-tiny flame, but not before leaving a burn mark on both the carpet and the couch. The carpet was repaired as described above -- we cut a small square out and replaced it with another small patch (I think we got it from a closet corner). The pillow was always burned which pissed my wife off to no end because we just bought the couch and the pillows matched.