by Ice Cream Jonsey » Fri Sep 19, 2003 10:36 am
You want to know? Okay. I will tell you.
She got in around noon yesterday. She was wearing a red bandana that she won from some natives while wagering on herself in arm wrestling in New Mexico. But that -- New Mexico -- is not my story to really tell. I am sure she will be on to relate the details of that encounter.
We brought the cats up and set them free to explore the house. And explore the house they did! They got very three dimensional on Apartment #L201. There are lots of shelves for them to hop onto, and with any luck they will all make it down safely and not break their legs on the way up or down, because I don't have pet insurance.
We then had some Chinese Food! I know what you are thinking. "Cats and Chinese food. That is my equivalent of your saying 'assjack' all the time. Jerk." But it was just a coincidence. I had the duck, and the duck was very tasty. (I was ravenous by that point, having been up most of the previous 36 hours, and if a living, regular duck had managed to unfortunately find itself in Downtown Lovely Longmont, I would have backed over it and ripped it apart with my bare hands and consumed and consumed and consumed.)
It was then off to the Mall. Yes! For those of you wondering, it was the self-same mall where 'Pirate of the Caribbean' was watched, and where I accidentally drop-kicked an empty beer bottle (mine) ten rows forward after getting back from a bathroom break. I picked up a couple of books so that I can properly passively aggressively "read at her" when things -- according to the poll in the other base -- begin to turn very sour.
(On my side, I am trying to get her to read _When Gravity Fails_ next. I have no idea why: she will see that my entire life is patterned around Marid Audran and probably view me as a liar, cheat and fraud and be reminded of this fact every time she goes to the fridge and sees nothing but a bottle of gin and a bunch of limes.)
After this, it was quite dark, and we listened to some music (hers), attempted to get a computer going in the living room (mine) and had some crackers and sharp cheddar and wine.
Oh! That reminds me of what happened next. Did you know that the carpet of my apartment is so clean that a guy could eat right off it?
After that, I rechecked my work on the Photoshopped pornography that I sent you two days ago. Still lookin' good! How about an update on that, Pinner? How's that going for you?
I then woke up today to hungry cats, which I attempted to feed. They were so happy to be given food that they turned the bowl of the soft stuff upside down and one cat dragged part of its kill onto the carpet. Luckily I own some carpet cleaner, so I sprayed it. (At the Nine Lives food -- not the cat!!!!)
(Okay, the cat.)
(Kidding.)
(Not kidding.)
(Kidding.)
I then left. My goal today is to work as hard as possible for my company, and research all the available billiards programs available for the PC so I can "train" on my "computer." There's content in them there hills on that, I think.
What does the future hold? I'd say that I didn't know, but I suspect it holds drinks, mixed drinks, "Bitter" lager and me posting like a royal subject of the Emasculated Duchy and Idiocracy of Fagroitville and you -- Pinner! -- finding none of this remotely amusing.
Ever onwards!
You want to know? Okay. I will tell you.
She got in around noon yesterday. She was wearing a red bandana that she won from some natives while wagering on herself in arm wrestling in New Mexico. But that -- New Mexico -- is not my story to really tell. I am sure she will be on to relate the details of that encounter.
We brought the cats up and set them free to explore the house. And explore the house they did! They got very three dimensional on Apartment #L201. There are lots of shelves for them to hop onto, and with any luck they will all make it down safely and not break their legs on the way up or down, because I don't have pet insurance.
We then had some Chinese Food! I know what you are thinking. "Cats and Chinese food. That is my equivalent of your saying 'assjack' all the time. Jerk." But it was just a coincidence. I had the duck, and the duck was very tasty. (I was ravenous by that point, having been up most of the previous 36 hours, and if a living, regular duck had managed to unfortunately find itself in Downtown Lovely Longmont, I would have backed over it and ripped it apart with my bare hands and consumed and consumed and consumed.)
It was then off to the Mall. Yes! For those of you wondering, it was the self-same mall where 'Pirate of the Caribbean' was watched, and where I accidentally drop-kicked an empty beer bottle (mine) ten rows forward after getting back from a bathroom break. I picked up a couple of books so that I can properly passively aggressively "read at her" when things -- according to the poll in the other base -- begin to turn very sour.
(On my side, I am trying to get her to read _When Gravity Fails_ next. I have no idea why: she will see that my entire life is patterned around Marid Audran and probably view me as a liar, cheat and fraud and be reminded of this fact every time she goes to the fridge and sees nothing but a bottle of gin and a bunch of limes.)
After this, it was quite dark, and we listened to some music (hers), attempted to get a computer going in the living room (mine) and had some crackers and sharp cheddar and wine.
Oh! That reminds me of what happened next. Did you know that the carpet of my apartment is so clean that a guy could eat right off it?
After that, I rechecked my work on the Photoshopped pornography that I sent you two days ago. Still lookin' good! How about an update on that, Pinner? How's that going for you?
I then woke up today to hungry cats, which I attempted to feed. They were so happy to be given food that they turned the bowl of the soft stuff upside down and one cat dragged part of its kill onto the carpet. Luckily I own some carpet cleaner, so I sprayed it. (At the Nine Lives food -- not the cat!!!!)
(Okay, the cat.)
(Kidding.)
(Not kidding.)
(Kidding.)
I then left. My goal today is to work as hard as possible for my company, and research all the available billiards programs available for the PC so I can "train" on my "computer." There's content in them there hills on that, I think.
What does the future hold? I'd say that I didn't know, but I suspect it holds drinks, mixed drinks, "Bitter" lager and me posting like a royal subject of the Emasculated Duchy and Idiocracy of Fagroitville and you -- Pinner! -- finding none of this remotely amusing.
Ever onwards!