Something Stinks in Netville

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Fri Aug 05, 2005 10:47 pm

Can I address the Internet at large by saying "you" without any of you guys taking it personally? It's just easier for me to type using lots of "yous," blame text adventures - I do.

Okay, the bunch of you finally stopped using "meh" to fucking describe everything, and I appreciate it. You had no idea how stupid the bunch of you sounded saying it. I knew it was a fad and I thought I'd wait patiently and I was right. It's pretty much dead.

So here's the next thing that's bugging me. And I'm not saying that anybody HERE is doing it. But on the two or three sites that I bother to check anymore, everyone who gets insulted in any way or anyone who sees someone else even MAKE A JOKE can't help but respond in a variant of the following.

1) "OH HA HA YOU REALLY GOT ME!! ZING!!!"

2) "Oh, (quote of what the other person said), you're trying to be funny."

3) "I WILL NOW EXPLAIN THE JOKE AND TRY TO INSINUATE THAT YOU SHOULD STOP MAKING JOKES, EVEN GOOD ONES, IN CAPITAL LETTERS."

Thank Christ nobody's doing it here. But if you are I will delete your post outright. Jesus, Mary, Mother of God... the only reason the Internet is even remotely readable in 2005 is because there are still handful of people out there busting their ass to try to make jokes or put people down -- who richly deserve it, natch -- in a funny way. And these ill-humored specimens have figured out that if they simply repeat what their superiors say or try to make telling jokes and hurling good insults uncool, well, maybe that will stop their feelings from getting hurt and maybe they can continue to post terribly.

Whatever. I can't stand to see this every time I so much as read a... well, I was going to say a "funny post on Slashdot," but let's be honest, there are none. So, fill in your own example. It's a trend that will take the slow-witted fuckers out there a good eight months to get over ("meh" honestly took forever for the retards to stop saying in response to everything) and I am happy that I can bypass this stupid phase by paying better attention to my job. But still.

That's my thoughts on this subject.

Lysander · Post by **Lysander** » Fri Aug 05, 2005 11:21 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Thank Christ nobody's doing it here. But if you are I will delete your post outright.

Oh, you're trying to be funny.

Knuckles the CLown · Post by **Knuckles the CLown** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 5:26 am

Don't delete the post. TERMINATE THE USER!

Worm · Post by **Worm** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 9:23 am

HEY GUYS I COULDN'T READ ANYTHING IN THE THREAD, COULD YOU TYPE BIGGER?

"M*h" is still around ICJ. I still hate "Y*sh" more.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 12:46 pm

Worm wrote:I still hate "Y*sh" more.

"Your mother gave me syphillus the last time I raped her, impregnated her, then gave her an abortion with my fist and tossed the fetus into the trash"?

Worm · Post by **Worm** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 1:03 pm

pinback wrote:
Worm wrote:I still hate "Y*sh" more.
"Your mother gave me syphillus the last time I raped her, impregnated her, then gave her an abortion with my fist and tossed the fetus into the trash"?

I mean 'yesh'.

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 1:08 pm

Well, this didn't exactly go as planned. Hurm.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 2:14 pm

Your last two posts have been:

1. "Traffic sucks!"

2. "The internet is annoying!"

Why don't you bring it next time with, "How come nobody in tech support speaks English?" Or perhaps: "Grocery stores: what's up with that?"

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 2:36 pm

Whoa, put down the bottle there, Pinpal, you're now more Hyde than Jekyll.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 2:46 pm

And you're more... uh... a big idiot, than... you know, somebody cool or something.

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 2:49 pm

The only thing worse than traffic generated by Denver citizens is the traffic generated by your posts.

chris · Post by **chris** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 4:12 pm

pinback wrote:Your last two posts have been:

1. "Traffic sucks!"

2. "The internet is annoying!"

I have to listen to ICJ's whining in one year, and hear you mewling about no woman liking you and "gee, aren't my little grey kitties cute?" in the other. I wish a trash compactor would fall on my head and spare me from this tripe.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 4:20 pm

If you would just do what I've already requested, and never ever come here, then we'd both solve a problem, wouldn't we?

chris · Post by **chris** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 5:43 pm

pinback wrote:If you would just do what I've already requested, and never ever come here, then we'd both solve a problem, wouldn't we?

Perhaps, but more people would benefit from YOU not being here than me. I don't see Worm or ICJ wishing me dead....

AArdvark · Post by **AArdvark** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 5:43 pm

Oh no, this is funny. It really is. It remids me of the old lady in the huge hulking Lincoln that can't drive for shit and really needs a dose of 12 gauge discharge (even though the zoning laws prohibit) funny funny laugh laugh

OK. I donut visit ANY forums except JC and Groucho. None of the offences happen at either site and probably won't so I am down with that.

THE
FUCK EVERYONE ELSE
WITH A BIG STICK
OFFN A MAPLE TREE
AARDVARK

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 5:57 pm

chris wrote:
pinback wrote:If you would just do what I've already requested, and never ever come here, then we'd both solve a problem, wouldn't we?
Perhaps, but more people would benefit from YOU not being here than me. I don't see Worm or ICJ wishing me dead....

Worm dislikes you intently, and ICJ apologizes continuously to me for your behavior here, insisting that in real life, you're really a decent guy.

chris · Post by **chris** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 7:19 pm

pinback wrote:Worm dislikes you intently, and ICJ apologizes continuously to me for your behavior here

More obvious falsehoods and distortions. I'm sure ICJ will be thrilled that you're trying to make me leave this board by sullying his good name.

Now go be a good boy and crawl back into your bottle.

pinback · Post by **pinback** » Sat Aug 06, 2005 8:10 pm

Hey, I'm just telling you what he told me.

"Yeah, I know he's kind of a dick on the board, but seriously pinner, he's not that boring and arrogant in real life. Well, not that boring, anyway."

That's what he said. So that's really all I have to go on.

chris · Post by **chris** » Sun Aug 07, 2005 10:22 am

pinback wrote:Hey, I'm just telling you what he told me.

"Yeah, I know he's kind of a dick on the board, but seriously pinner, he's not that boring and arrogant in real life. Well, not that boring, anyway."

That's what he said. So that's really all I have to go on.

That's........quite upsetting. Care to comment on this accusation RobB?

Ice Cream Jonsey · Post by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Sun Aug 07, 2005 11:33 am

I've apologized for every single one of you. I'm apologizing for Pinback now.