[REVIEW] Boxes & Barrels II

[pinback]

Well, I'm almost two full years behind the time on this game, as I was with the original incarnation, but now that I have a computer decent enough to run it, and some (well, a lot of) free time, it's time to play:

BOXES & BARRELS II, the continuing story of Gordon Freeman!

BOXES & BARRELS II starts with a bunch of confusing stuff that nobody could understand unless they'd played the original B&B, and I DID play the original, and even I don't know what's going on. But whatever. Story aside, you, as the hapless scientist who is important for some reason I can't remember, must go on your quest to find whatever it is you're supposed to find, all the while using, pushing, dodging, throwing, climbing on, and walking on as many boxes and barrels as you can find!

Those who appreciated the first game, but thought "if only it had even more boxes and barrels", this game will be right up your alley.

I doubt I'm more than 1/4 of the way through the game at this point, and I still don't know what the point of the story is, or what's going on, which is something I miss from the original game, where you didn't know what was going on, but you weren't SUPPOSED to. Now I feel like I missed the first week of school.

However, about the technical prowess and just plain old fun, I can only say this about BOXES & BARRELS II: Whoa! Computer gaming has advanced in the past six years! Why wasn't I informed?

I give BOXES & BARRELS II a hearty "fine & dandy"!

[milker]

Do you get a sawed of shutgun mutha fucka?

No honestly sounds like good stuff. You need any testers?

Something about Morgan Freeman and a barrel of rum would make it a pirates life for me.

Shit, I should have called this Johnny Depp Stylie instead. Ah hell, where was I going with this post.

Ok, back to play some Prey.

[milker]

Ok, I thought for some reason you were making said game, but the damn milker just completely glanced and did not comprehend your post.

Where did you get said game?

Is said game readily available?

[Worm]

He's talking about HL2!

[Vitriola]

I thought he was talking about what Robb has to unpack downstaris. And I mean, like, real soon.

[milker]

Well, I tell you, at $80.00 a barrel these days, I might hold off on shooting the damn thing and put it in a personal reserve.

Yeah, there is a new mod for HL2. What you do is go around the whole game and hoard up barrels of oil for your own personal reserve. You win if you get a personal reserve built up before the hybrid takes over.

It should be a real hoot. You will win every time!

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

I doubt I'm more than 1/4 of the way through the game at this point, and I still don't know what the point of the story is, or what's going on, which is something I miss from the original game, where you didn't know what was going on, but you weren't SUPPOSED to. Now I feel like I missed the first week of school.

"The right man at the right time " -- or was it the right man at the wrong time? Shit, who knows. The entire story to that stupid game is completely forgettable. Valve actually seems to prefer it that way. How do you do that good a job on the graphics, tactics, voice-acting, levels and monsters and then, when it comes to the story, give it to the intern? Fuck those guys.

I'd like to finish it as well, though. I'm stuck trying to use a giant magnet to move a train car that won't move. I have half-magnetism. I am half-frustrated.