Steam / Windows Live Awfulness

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Just keeping a record of how terrible it is when a game can be purchased on Steam, but demands you also use Windows Live for Live Live.

I bought BioShock 2. I'm willing to say it sucks, because the first one was so good. But one of the reasons it sucks is because it's coupled with Windows Gold Live.

I stopped playing it a month before PAX East. I wanted to get a quick level in just now. I understand that there was probably a patch at that point, but...

Well, in finishing Fallout 3 last week on my new PC, I picked up the two pieces of downloadable content I had purchased a year ago. Windows Bing Gold downloaded it. I got my save game over because I am good with computers: Windows Live Messenger couldn't give a shit.

However, when I had Windows Live for Games up, it did not check to see if BioShock 2 had a patch. It could have assessed the state of my other Windows Live Arcade for Windows Games and determined if they needed an update. LIKE HOW STEAM DOES. But no.

So, yeah: started up BioShock 2. First thing it tells me is that there was an update. Okay. Since Windows Live for Gamers handles save games ... which is entirely fucking stupid, it won't let me continue unless I apply the patch. Gritting my teeth, I tell it to go ahead and the initial progress bar sits there for a solid two minutes with no progress.

Windows Live has been blocked by Windows Firewall before, so I alt-tab to check and see if that's the case. It's not. Miraculously, I'm able to alt-tab back into BioShock 2. The progress bar is simply shittily programmed, and doesn't update very well.

It FINALLY fucking finishes downloading whatever it needs, and it tells me to exit the game. OK. I exit the game. A new Windows-style dialog box is waiting for me, and it applies the patch. Why the fuck couldn't it do that to begin with, I have no idea. Why they think I'd like to be in BioShock 2 unable to use my computer while it downloads, I have no idea.

Using Silverbing is a giant "Fuck You" to anyone who buys the PC port of a game. Great, Microsoft threw some money at 2K Games so they'd force us to use this shitware. It's just such a fucking mess, and it's getting worse: not better.

I used to think that wrestling with IRQs on sound cards and CD-ROMs was the biggest travesty in PC gaming, but actually, that was something that the OS (DOS) hadn't been designed to really deal with, and everyone was just doing the best they could. It made some logical sense: you needed to separate the ports the interrupt requests came in on. Windows Live for Games, however, is a complete mess and everyone working on it should please, please, please resign. Not from Microsoft, or the project, but from life.

[AArdvark]

they go to such lengths to protect these games that they make them unplayable or enjoyable

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

I also dislike their naming conventions for things.

[RealityCheck]

Just reading that made me stabby.

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

"Bing" really is the dumbest name of all their stuff, and all their stuff has dumb names.

[milker]

You are good with computers?

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

HEY MEESTER MAN