Cryptozookeeper on Steam

[AArdvark]

The man in the Silk suit buys a new car from the profits he makes on your dreams

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

I tweeted this, but if we get anyone that registers between now and the end of the year I will give them a Steam key. (And if you don't have one already just lemme know.)

[Flack]

I will STREAM this soon!

[Tdarcos]

This is a new review that I really appreciated: https://spillhistorie.no/2018/10/24/inn ... zookeeper/

for those wanting to read the review but aren't good with Norwegian, or whatever it was, here's a link to

The Bing Translated page:
https://www.translatetheweb.com/?ref=TV ... okeeper%2F

The Google Translated Page:
https://translate.google.com/translate? ... zookeeper/

Here's the opening:
Impression: Cryptozookeeper
October 24, 2018, 12:10 p.m. by Joachim Froholt

Are you looking for an adventure game completely out of the ordinary? Take a look at Cryptozookeeper.

Cryptozookeeper follows a guy named William Vest, who makes a living by delivering more or less lugubrious packages to more or less lugubrious people. It all starts with a job where he has to transport a package marked "bone marrow from an alien" to a known criminal. The delivery job goes straight west, and before he knows it, he is in a cell with the body of his best friend. In fact, his day will be even tougher before the next few hours are over.

There was one word I had to look up in the above:

Definition of Lugubrious. looking or sounding sad and gloomy.

If the game is described correctly, I think delivering more or less suspicious packages to more or less suspicious people" is probably more correct. Jonsey?

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Cryptozookeeper received a negative review on Steam last year from someone in China because the game does not have Chinese support. If you were wondering how my relationship with that murderous, organ-harvesting, brainwashed garbage country was going.

[Jizaboz]

Cryptozookeeper received a negative review on Steam last year from someone in China because the game does not have Chinese support. If you were wondering how my relationship with that murderous, organ-harvesting, brainwashed garbage country was going.

Hahaha as if Chinese is a common lang supported by game makers!!

I'd volunteer to help create a Japanese version but that's waaaayy to much text, man.

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Yes. I used to just dislike the Chinese government, but now I don't like their people either. I wish that Tank Man had a larger tank and was inside that tank and ran over the first tank with his tank.

[pinback]

How's that Linux port coming along?

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Yes. I used to just dislike the Chinese government, but now I don't like their people either. I wish that Tank Man had a larger tank and was inside that tank and ran over the first tank with his tank.

I don't want anyone thinking I'm taking sides though

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

How's that Linux port coming along?

You're looking at my gut aren't you?

I'm working on it!!

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

This is the original announcement I wrote on rec.games.int-fiction when I released the game on June 3rd, 2011.

Hey there r*if, it's been a long time, but I haven't had a craving for cretinous blovations deconstructing the same tired and largely
incorrect points about Galatea in just as shitty a manner as they were made ten years ago, nor have I needed to hear how the wonderful and
approachable Inform7 is responsible for all the pain and suffering in the western world. But I hope we can put how awful you are as a Usenet
group behind you since you drove virtually all my friends off, and focus on what really matters: what I've been up to.
I made a game called Cryptozookeeper, and you can download it through the Internet Archive here: (url removed)

cryptozookeeper.zip will get you everything you need if you're on Windows. At https://www.cryptozookeeper.com there's instructions for the Mac terp (I've heard Splatterlight works, but I don't own a Mac) and the Linux terp (thanks to Gerynar for putting that together).

At this point, if the previous times I've announced games here is any indication, the next three or four posts will be people losing their
goddamn Christing minds because the archive size is almost 600 MB. If this absolutely makes you go mental and you have some way to compress MP3s better than PKZIP I'm all ears, otherwise if this really bothers you, I would invite you to party Phil Katz-style. (Though if you don't want to listen to the music, and that's perfectly legitimate, because I'm sure I'd hate r*if's taste in music in the same way you'll
probably hate mine, you can grab the story file and graphics files individually at archive.org.)

I've tried to put together a game that is funny, hopping and character-driven, but also with bits of RPGs in there as you create and train
cryptids like Big Foot, the Loch Ness Monster, shadow people and the fur-bearing trout. Let's just have makeup sex here, r*if, and get
through this, and then we can go back to pretending the other doesn't exist.

Yours in Christ,

Robb

The comment about inviting the inevitable screechers on the newsgroup to party "Phil Katz" style is a reference to the fact that Phil Katz created the ZIP standard, and was found dead in a hotel room with an empty bottle of peppermint schnapps in his hand. A coroner's report stated his death was a result of acute pancreatic bleeding caused by chronic alcoholism.

[Roody_Yogurt]

I hope that when you came to Milwaukee, you remembered that you were coming to Phil Katz Land!