Jolt Country

Man. What got into this guy?

Jethro Q. Walrustitty wrote:The Alien Resurrection review is the silliest piece of text ever posted to the internet.

The surprises and the pleasures all come with the Ripley character, who is given one of the greatest turns in sequel history. See, now she's, genetically, part alien. One of the greatest joys of the film is wondering whose side she's really on, because instead of the grim intensity of her life-and-death struggle through in the first three films, now she walks around with a perpetual smirk, as if she's enjoying watching others flail around for once.

Except for the run-on sentence, that's the sort of sucking patter that you hear from first-year radio DJs.

All that for a movie that sucks, sucks, sucks. Oh, and Alien3 sucks, too - but geez, Alien Resurrection was absolutely terrible, and I like the director.

Pinback defended his views of Alien 4 better than anyone else on the Internet, ever. Do I think it was a terrible movie? Well, yes. However, there was at least something dome with the whole resurrection concept. It's very easy for movies to bring back the dead -- and they are worse than comic books in the respect that oftentimes, the explanation is downright chortleworthy. If they had "brought back" Ripley and just left her alone as a normal working girl, then the thing would truly be a no-star flick instead of the grudging two stars that even people who hated it have to give it.

Not having seen his list, let me guess - he probably loves Trainspotting, too. OI!

This is what it's like to be JQW's friend, ladies and gentlemen. He is so myopic that he actually thinks he got a great blast off right there. A real ZINGER. In his mind, since he is ridiculously anti-drug (for no good reason, mind you) a movie that glorifies the use of heroin must not only be terrible, but EVERYONE must agree with him! He can't conceive of a world where Trainspotting got more good reviews than bad. Which it did. So he has this big blind spot where Trainspotting is concerned.

Anyway. I am not going to do a great job in my next few sentences, but it has to be said: you're alone. That's not a great barb you just threw. I have absolutely no opinion of Trainspotting whatsoever, and even *I* had to shake my head in stunned silence there.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:then the thing would truly be a no-star flick instead of the grudging two stars that even people who hated it have to give it.

And what about the last 20 minutes? Am I the only one who thought that it was a terribly moving, painful, and INTERESTING sequence of film? A little whacked-out, sure, but we like that over here.

We have an interesting, entertaining spin on Ripley's resurrection, and 20 minutes of pretty damn cool movie at the end, and people are saying that this was worse than Alien 3? There is no fucking way that Resurrection was worse than Alien 3. Alien 3 SUCKED, though not quite as hard as everyone says (hence my earlier stance than it's underrated). At least Resurrection had parts that were, you know, entertaining?

Moving and painful?

Ah.......

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Man, the dude's not happy unless he can break out his crying towel, and weep like a little bitch with a skinned knee whenever the movie tells him he should. The guy would probably flood the theater if he saw Patch Adams, and breaks into hitching sobs when he sees the cancer kids with red clown noses defending the idiotic doctor.

Anyways, better save up your Kleenex money for the upcoming Alien Quadrilogy box set, which'll have nine DVDs, including a nearly 3-hour cut of Alien3, and alternative beginning and endings for AR.

Some really alternate footage for AR would be some that doesn't, well, suck ass juice through a crazy straw.

Of course, glancing at the movies in the link that Jonsey posted indicates that Pinback is, how shall we put this... not a very adventurous moviewatcher. Virtually all big budget action movies... Yeah, I guess if your steady diet of moviefare includes Air Force One, Con Air, Face/Off, and Mimic, you might get choked up in AR. But for God's sake, don't admit it.

Jonsey, can I ban guest accounts in this base?

Okay, how 'bout this: Can I ban fucking ASSHOLE accounts in this base?

pinback wrote:Okay, how 'bout this: Can I ban fucking ASSHOLE accounts in this base?

If you do that, you won't be able to get back in...

Bitch.

Jethro Q. Walrustitty, everyone! Isn't he marvelous!

pinback wrote:Okay, how 'bout this: Can I ban fucking ASSHOLE accounts in this base?

How about instead you bring the comedy and offer up a scathing and biting retort?

Kids these days. It's always ban, ban, ban, ban, baBANNED!

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: How about instead you bring the comedy and offer up a scathing and biting retort?

Because it's not worth retorting to. If you're just going to come on here and be nasty for no reason at all, why would I waste my time continuing a dialogue?