Jolt Country

Sure I did. I was just hoping for a more home-grown, do it yourself video. Like the kind where you line up all the candies on the counter-top and eat them one by one and give us a mouth-feel review while eating them.

There, I just did a video outline for you, now you just fill in the blank spots with video.

THE
SHOOTING SCRIPT
AARDVARK

I'm never going to make a video.


So just to update everyone on the status of my reviews:

1. The original salmiakki is still a 10/10. Man that stuff is tasty and I plan on stocking up on it shortly.

2. The Pantteri is getting dropped to a 5/10. The Nyquil taste got really tiresome really fast.

3. I'm dropping the super salmiakki down to an 8/10. Again, I get the salty black licorice, but adding menthol to the equation just doesn't make any sense to me.

4. The PAX I'm keeping at 2/10 since it is still better than the new butterfingers.


There are a number of other salmiakki treats I plan on reviewing in the future here so stay tuned!

AArdvark wrote: Tue Apr 21, 2020 4:30 pmgive us a mouth-feel review

They all have a similar density and texture, smooth all the way through and their density is somewhere between a gummy bear and jujube. They do not become noticeably softer as they warm up in your mouth. Nibbling on them will release more of the salt flavor but it is unlikely you will be able to bite all the way through one without considerable effort. They just keep flattening out as bite force is exerted and they get really sticky from your saliva so they will flatten out and wrap themselves around a tooth long before splitting in two.

They can then be easily peeled off with a toothpick or your finger as a last result. The inconvenience this creates is simply a reminder to take your time with them. This is why I have found the ideal method of consumption to be allowing them to dissolve on your tongue while making the occasional nibble to tease some of the salt out until it has dissolved completely.

The mouth-feel is very pleasing, but not enough to make ICJ's mouth-feel thread where he is asking for only the best mouth-feel.

Its true. That thread has had a couple posts where people were talking about just "good" mouth feels. I deleted the posts and screwed with Retro's account permissions while I was in the panel.

I'm never going to make a video.

Well maybe I'll make a video and review these candies by proxy

AArdvark wrote: Wed Apr 22, 2020 3:10 am

I'm never going to make a video.

Well maybe I'll make a video and review these candies by proxy

I'd love to see what you come up with!

And again Billy: Fuck you you worthless piece of shit.

Hurtful.

Man, they's a lot of stress here lately.

What were their names?