Jolt Country

Sunday I am entering a citywide weight loss contest. The contest goes for 12 weeks, and you have to weigh in and weigh out at the local YMCA. S/he who loses the most weight (by percentage) wins. Here are the prizes:

1st Place Winners:
Fenton Nissan – 2012 Nissan Versa
The YMCA – One Year Free Membership
SUBWAY® restaurants – $350 Gift Card
Academy Sports – $300 Gift Certificate

2nd Place Winners:
Fenton Nissan –$500 Gas Gift Card
The YMCA – One Year Free Membership
SUBWAY® restaurants – $350 Gift Card
Academy Sports – $200 Gift Certificate

3rd Place Winners:
Fenton Nissan – $250 Gas Gift Card
The YMCA – One Year Free Membership
SUBWAY® restaurants – $350 Gift Card
Academy Sports – $100 Gift Certificate

I like to talk shit so I am throwing this out -- I plan on driving that car home on August 11th, the day the contest ends.

I have spent the past week eating whatever I want in hopes of bulking up before the contest. This is not really cheating because I spent the past 38 years eating whatever I wanted and bulking up before there was a contest. So really we like to call this "status quo" ...

I plan on spending some time tomorrow doing a bit of research on how to lose the most weight over 3 months. I suspect what I will find is "diet and exercise," but you never know.

I know that during this time ICJ will be spending about 3 days in Oklahoma and one of the things I greatly enjoy is taking visitors to restaurants, so we'll see how that works out. I also have an Alaskan cruise set for a week in the middle of the competition so I will try to hold back on the butter as I eat 900 crabs during that week. So there are some obstacles in there but I plan on compensating for them by eating sticks and grass the other 11 weeks.

Everyone wrote:Alright! Go Flack! Good luck!

Aw, thanks!

Flack wrote: I plan on spending some time tomorrow doing a bit of research on how to lose the most weight over 3 months. I suspect what I will find is "diet and exercise," but you never know.

Well, you could just be a horrific fatass for the first ten weeks, and then chainsaw both of your legs off at the hip.

That'd probably be a good 60 pounds or so.

Bruce

I wanted to see what the Nissan Venton looks like before I throw out any encouraging words, my friend. A new car this day could run on crop circles and look like an alarmed buffalo. I may not want to point you into this direction.

This diet is easy to follow:

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Last Sunday I weighed in at 370.

At the end of week one, my weight is 357.

I realize most of that is water weight. in week two I am kicking up the cardio and sticking with my current diet. LOOK OUT NINTENDO WII FITNESS!

I'm trying to only weigh once a week, but the scale this morning said 354.9, which puts me at 15 pounds down in 10 days. This is a healthy rate of weight loss, but not enough to win a diet contest. EXERCISE BEGINS TODAY!

Flack, what weight loss mentality have you been observing?

Solid food restriction?

Atkins?

Good ol' cutting out the coffee and sugar?

Only eating in?

Inquiring minds want details, your battle plan and HOW YOU WILL WIN THIS THING!

We've gone from eating out 5 nights a week to 1.

For breakfast I went from having one or two McDonald's breakfast burritos (300 calories each) and a large vanilla iced coffee (270 calories) to having 1/2 cup of egg beaters (60 calories) and black coffee (0 calories).

For lunch I've been taking a sandwich or a frozen meal, a piece of fruit, and either some crackers or a cheese stick. I've gone from 1,500 calorie lunches (on average, sometimes more) to 500.

I've replaced all my lattes and such with sugar free energy drinks (5 calories), black coffee, and water. I'm having too much caffeine still but ... baby steps.

About an hour ago I was wanting a snack and instead of a bowl of cereal or a candy bar I had an apple.

I'll say this about the apple thing.

There is a box of candy to help 1) the poor 2) the disadvantaged and 3) psychotic sociopaths with mics at work. I get ravenously hungry, every day, at 3:00 PM. On a bad week I go to the box. I put a dollar in, I get something terrible for me.

When I bring two or three apples into work, I just eat them instead. It's a simple thing that everyone else does and has been doing for hundreds of years, which is where I got the idea from. If I am still hungry after the first apple, I just eat a second one. God, re-reading this is like a baby telling everyone about how it learned how to walk, but still.

In my car there are seven green apples. The cold weather tonight will keep them crisp, fresh, delicious. Being in my car means it will be impossible for me to forget them. I hope that Flack will in a few weeks be able to leave apples in his car -- his NEW CAR!

I had a similar plan, except it was 90 degrees here over the weekend so all the apples in my car got mushy.

My wife picked up some kiwi ... not a huge fan, but it's okay. Really I find that many fruits are better with sugar added.

I didn't win the car.

I quit dieting and exercising.

I went back to eating breakfast at McDonald's.

I gained all of the weight back.

My new strat. for life is to eschew all positive changes in exchange for old habits and only doing what feels comfortable.

RetroR wrote:My new strat. for life is to eschew all positive changes in exchange for old habits and only doing what feels comfortable.

What a terribly RetroR thing to say.

https://www.healthywage.com/healthywager/

We were visionaries ahead of our time!

I went on vacation and blotted out all the progress I made in the last month.

Anyone who is excessively overweight should not have a second course of anything.

Tdarcos wrote: Sat Oct 22, 2022 12:57 pm Anyone who is excessively overweight should not have a second course of anything.

What about starbursts? I mean you should get thirty seconds of those, right?