Jolt Country

AArdvark wrote: Tue Dec 31, 2024 5:53 am My 28 friends won't notice that much.

I will miss random photos of Aardvarks while you are checked into random places around the world.

Happy New Year!

Happy new year

Keeping with tradition, I will review watching new years on TV.

Tons of country music this year for some reason. Maybe that genre is becoming popular? I don’t know, but it suuuucks. The pinnacle of this was a dude came out looking like Zak Bagins’ (Ghost Adventures) brother with a huge beer gut and skinny jeans preforming a country/ metal song. Yup, it was fucking awful.

A highlight came up when random rappers did a stupid song for a bit featuring dumb ass Jarule, Fat Joe (more like dad body Joe now), Slick Rick, and others. Then more country and bullshit.

Oh I almost forgot the most awful country moment. Red haired dude with a beard in a coal cave in West Virginia bellaring that song about “and yur dollar ain’t shit” to some actual miners sitting on a rock looking at him awkwardly as he sings but has to pause every time a “shit” comes lol. Stupid.

The whole night as I’m drinking cheap champagne from Aldi with Lyndsay and substances kick in I wonder “wtf is going on here? Why is this so weird? Politics maybe? That would be dumb..”

Then I utter aloud “where are the ass clapping attention whores?” to which she’s like “wut?” I say “you know Cardi B, Megan the Stallion, Foxy Red?” No reaction or response lol

That would change at 2;30 am when Keisha steps out in a red rubber suit with her ass out sporting Cyberpunk sunglasses. Her backup “dancers” were dudes crawling around the floor in animal sex masks. Many lyrics were censored as she sang the words of the title; “Joy Ride” with a manly voice. Not exactly what I was looking for, but I’ll take it.

I tell myself I'm not staying up until midnight every year. I actually did it once about three or four years ago, I went to bed at Ten. Staying up until midnight is really not worth it, if it ever was, maybe when I was a youngster it was worth it. Now it messes with the sleep cycles and makes the next day totally blah. I hardly had anything to drink. I mean, I had the typical two martinis and a couple of beers, that was it. Nobody even wanted champagne this year. It used to be fun to see Times Square and all the people. After Guy Lombardo gave it up and Dick Clark took over, things started to go downhill. Now New Years Eve is just unwatchable. Too many Country performers, nothing for the aging rock audience. We did have the TV on but the volume was way way down. We were playing Cards Against Humanity while we waited for midnight . We have The Big Box set and the Mrs. bought a bunch of add-on packs. It sounded like fun; much better than Monopoly. Another sign we're getting old is the amount of times we had to hit up Google to understand what the new cards were talking about. There were a lot of people and other things nobody knew. At least they had pictures on the new cards.

"Big Log"
Robert Plant

AArdvark wrote: Wed Jan 01, 2025 12:56 pm Nobody even wanted champagne this year. It used to be fun to see Times Square and all the people. After Guy Lombardo gave it up and Dick Clark took over, things started to go downhill. Now New Years Eve is just unwatchable. Too many Country performers, nothing for the aging rock audience.

Aye but that Kei$ha at 2:30 AM EST. Entertaining and full confirmation of living in an awful future. I actually enjoyed it but really wondered where the real nasty rap chicks were at for 2 hours.

"Joy Ride" should straight up be Cyberpunk 2077 DLC. Lady Gay Gay tried to pull this sort of shit off and it fucking sucked.

Get in, loser, for the joyride
Makin' every motherfucker turn

I was painting the kitchen in an old pair of jeans and one of the knees ripped out. I threw them away because I wont wear ripped clothes. They are not a status thing but a sign of poverty.

AArdvark wrote: Sun Jan 05, 2025 3:37 pm I was painting the kitchen in an old pair of jeans and one of the knees ripped out. I threw them away because I wont wear ripped clothes. They are not a status thing but a sign of poverty.

Or it could be someone smart enough to know that when painting you're likely to get paint spatter on your clothes, so you wear the worst ones that you don't care if they get paint on them.

Buffy came on after xfiles and opened with a scene in an arcade with a Funhouse machine.

If it were some magical Twilight Zone day where a genie showed up in the moment offered me any of the female cast in this scene I would pick the pinball machine.

Anyone else have random games install themselves on their phones?

AArdvark wrote: Fri Jan 10, 2025 3:49 pm Anyone else have random games install themselves on their phones?

The fact that Android allows that shit is unfathomable.

There's an app on your phone that installs that shit. You have to figure out what that app is, and disable it. (I dont think you can uninstall it because Android).

I know it's a program I installed that's letting these things in, I just don't know which one for sure. The last thing I installed was Violoncello, a text-only web browser. There's only two other third party apps on my phone, a Boss tuner and Stellarium, an astronomy program. I've had both of them for years. Unless it was a recent update that's causing it

You know what's worse than seeing an ambulance in the driveway of the nice old lady's house down the street?

discovering that it's really a Medical Examiner van.

Oh well... One less Christmas card next year

I found an old Playboy VHS tape. About halfway through the tape there's a Flashdance-like sequence where a naked woman dances on a stage with a boombox in the background. I rewound and pased the clip multiple times... trying to figure out what kind of boombox it was. I think it's a JVC but I'm not sure.

Hehehehe, were you looking hard at her box?

AArdvark wrote: Sat Jan 11, 2025 10:18 am I know it's a program I installed that's letting these things in, I just don't know which one for sure. The last thing I installed was Violoncello, a text-only web browser. There's only two other third party apps on my phone, a Boss tuner and Stellarium, an astronomy program. I've had both of them for years. Unless it was a recent update that's causing it

Who is your carrier?

On T-Mobile, I think the app is called AppSelector. Disabling it would prevent unauthorized installs from T-Mo. I'm sure you have something similar.

My text only browser cannot use any of the big search engines anymore. Up until last week it worked just fine on Google, Duckduck and Bing. Now they all just refuse me because I don't want to see any pictures when I browse. If I was paranoid, I would wonder why it's so important that I see pictures when I surf the web

Surfing the web without images? That's like watching a movie with the sound off!

AArdvark wrote: Wed Jan 29, 2025 4:09 am My text only browser cannot use any of the big search engines anymore. Up until last week it worked just fine on Google, Duckduck and Bing. Now they all just refuse me because I don't want to see any pictures when I browse. If I was paranoid, I would wonder why it's so important that I see pictures when I surf the web

Confused, images (well, videos) are the #1 thing I consume from the internet. Don't tell me you're still a Playboy magazine guy like my dad.