Jolt Country

Ever wonder exactly what you can sign your credit card receipts with, and get away with it?

http://www.zug.com/pranks/credit_card/

This is the second time he's done this.....COMEDY GOLD!

I'm not sure he's 'getting away' with anything. Any idiot at the credit card companies knows that someone who really wanted to steal would sign a real name carefully, and that if you didn't have to pay for charges made with a fake name, then everyone would go on a shopping spree, signing names like 'Your Mother' and 'Assburglar'.

As for the people at the stores, well, they really don't give a shit, they don't have to give a shit, and they don't want to be involved, either. If I were cashier jockeying and I saw someone scrawling on the credit slip, I'd remember the bank tellers that get stickup note stories and pour the lunatic a beer while he was ripping off the store, just in case he had a gun. And because I hated my store, and because armed robbery victims get lots of pussy.

I think this guy needs to work a mind-numbing minimum wage job to understand that the cashiers simply do not give a shit what hilarious things he is going to put on his receipt. They're not dunked in glaze, they're not mindless cretins... they're simply not paid enough to care.

Give them, I don't know -- $20 an hour and I'd bet you most of them would care. Of course, he would then not be able to pay $7.34 for donuts, but instead $73.40.

Also, this irritated me, but for personal reasons:

I decided to use the "tip calculator" to reduce the total bill by the amount I felt I should be credited (10%). Then I signed the bill with my reasoning, and snapped a photo of the copy before I left.

God dammit. This was how the "Chicks Dig Jerks" prequel was going to start. Motherfucking Christ. If I don't instantly put my ideas into some sort of permanent form they eventually get (independently) ganked by someone else. This happens all the goddamn time! I thought I was creative at times, but I am instead just one step ahead of the zeitgeist.

I should say!! I didn't mean to fag up this thread. The one about the toll was very solid in my opinion. Them cashing the check was sadly hilarious.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:I think this guy needs to work a mind-numbing minimum wage job to understand that the cashiers simply do not give a shit what hilarious things he is going to put on his receipt. They're not dunked in glaze, they're not mindless cretins... they're simply not paid enough to care.

That's a piss-poor attitude towards work. If somebody has taken it upon themselves to hire you and pay you money to perform a job, then it's your responsiblity to actually PERFORM THE JOB. And part of that job is supposed to be verification of credit card signatures.

Give them, I don't know -- $20 an hour and I'd bet you most of them would care.

I disagree. You can pay somebody $50/hour to run a checkout, but if their corporate training doesn't include hammering it into their heads to check credit card signatures, it's not going to get done. That's the point the guy is trying to make....stores don't care what signature or whose credit card you use, they just want the money. If somebody uses a stolen credit card to buy $1000 worth of groceries from Wegmans, it's not Wegmans who has to absorb the cost of the theft....it's the credit card provider.

Credit cards are damn useful things, but God help you if the card (or even just the number) gets stolen. I know one guy who had his card stolen by a roommate. The guy went to a clothing store and bought tons of clothes with it. The victim brought absolute proof to the police of who stole the card and what he did with it....and the police did NOTHING. The stores don't care, the cops don't care, and your credit rating could go right into the toilet over something like this. Makes you wonder if they're really worth carrying around, now doesn't it?

chris wrote:That's a piss-poor attitude towards work. If somebody has taken it upon themselves to hire you and pay you money to perform a job, then it's your responsiblity to actually PERFORM THE JOB. And part of that job is supposed to be verification of credit card signatures.

They probably did, at the beginning, but jobs like that have a way of eating away at one's soul.

I will leave out the fact that paying someone a minimum wage means that you get a minimum effort in return and how ridiculous it is for companies to convienently schedule drone workers for 36 hours so they don't have to pay them any benefits, as that's this whole other thing -- but people just shut off their brains when they become customers. Otherwise reasonable people turn into catty, condescending, power-tripping little weasels. (And sure, there is some snake-eating-its-tail going on here: I've lost my patience with the upsell. I went into an EB last night and, swear to God, the register kid offered some guy buying a Playstation game a "lifetime warranty" for the game for $3. $3 extra and if anything goes wrong with it, ever, they will replace it with a new one!!!! Actually, this deserves its own thread).

Uh, anyway, I can see how someone working a register at Dunkin' Donuts no longer cares. It's not worth the hassle.

Credit cards are damn useful things, but God help you if the card (or even just the number) gets stolen. I know one guy who had his card stolen by a roommate. The guy went to a clothing store and bought tons of clothes with it. The victim brought absolute proof to the police of who stole the card and what he did with it....and the police did NOTHING. The stores don't care, the cops don't care, and your credit rating could go right into the toilet over something like this. Makes you wonder if they're really worth carrying around, now doesn't it?

I like the part where the cops don't care. This is why people hate cops. Jesus, this one dude LIVES with a credit card fraud and the cops can't be bothered to go pick him up? The fuck? The guy did everything but scrawl "FREE CROOKS FOR PICKUP" on a cardboard sign and put it at the end of a donut trail like he was Elliot trying to get a glimpse of E. fucking T. and the cops sat there as bored as an ox on a hill. Jesus, Mary, Mother of God. Was this in Rochester?

chris wrote:The victim brought absolute proof to the police of who stole the card and what he did with it....and the police did NOTHING.

Did they do a report? Or they probably told him to call 311 and make a report that way. Either way it's probably up to small claims court at that point. Judge Judy has crap like that on all the time.

Rochester cops don't seem to do much unless the crime is going on right now, even then they are completely inept.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:I like the part where the cops don't care. This is why people hate cops. Jesus, this one dude LIVES with a credit card fraud and the cops can't be bothered to go pick him up? The fuck? The guy did everything but scrawl "FREE CROOKS FOR PICKUP" on a cardboard sign and put it at the end of a donut trail like he was Elliot trying to get a glimpse of E. fucking T. and the cops sat there as bored as an ox on a hill. Jesus, Mary, Mother of God. Was this in Rochester?

Yep, about 7 years ago now. The guy found out about the theft (and subsequent purchases), went to the store where the purchases were made, got proof that the guy forged his signature on the credit card receipt (he had the guy's own signature for comparison), and either had a description of the guy from the cashier or a surveillance tape of the guy buying the stuff (I can't remember which). He may have also found the items purchased (clothing) in his room. Took it to the cops, and they did nothing. They took the proof and apparently assigned it to a detective, but I guess the detective had better things to do. It's been a long time (and I could be a little wrong about the outcome), but I think I recall the victim complaining that from time to time he'd call the detective to get a status on his case, and nothing new had been done.

Yeah - but what about when you get gas and "pay at the pump"... or order something on the internet or QVC? You can buy $100's worth of high-octane goodness from your local corner Habib Mart with absoutely no scrutiny. Hell - you can stand there and give a line of cars free gas from some poor schmuck's lost/stolen credit card until the bank figures out what's going on and shuts it off.

nessman wrote:Yeah - but what about when you get gas and "pay at the pump"... or order something on the internet or QVC? You can buy $100's worth of high-octane goodness from your local corner Habib Mart with absoutely no scrutiny.

And wait until the credit card companies start putting RFID tags in their cards so you can just wave the card in front of a reader to pay for your stuff. Some schmuck in line behind you with an RFID detector will grab your data as soon as you use it.

It's too bad that most people only care about the convenience aspect of technology and pay no heed towards the problems it creates.

chris wrote:And wait until the credit card companies start putting RFID tags in their cards so you can just wave the card in front of a reader to pay for your stuff.

Two words for you my wood-carving, mini-disc listening friend... Mobil SpeedPass.

Some schmuck in line behind you with an RFID detector will grab your data as soon as you use it.

Wouldn't surprise me. Will be up there with the people who stole cell phone ESN numbers with a black box, people with scanner radios listening to cell phone convo's and stealing credit card #'s, etc.

nessman wrote:

chris wrote:And wait until the credit card companies start putting RFID tags in their cards so you can just wave the card in front of a reader to pay for your stuff.

Two words for you my wood-carving, mini-disc listening friend... Mobil SpeedPass.

I know that SpeedPass uses RFID (in fact, a very old version of RFID that apparently has little to know encryption). However, nobody is standing behind you while you wave it in front of the pump.

chris wrote:I know that SpeedPass uses RFID (in fact, a very old version of RFID that apparently has little to know encryption). However, nobody is standing behind you while you wave it in front of the pump.

Don't forget about the "ez-pass" type of tag you can get for your car (all you have to do is drive next to the pump and it kicks on for you - which worked maybe 30% of the time). But I eventually stopped using SpeedPass since Mobil is generally some of the priciest gas around.