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Fortune Cookie Malice

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 1:22 pm
by bruce
Clearly this one I just got belongs to someone else:
Asshole Fortune Cookie wrote:You never worry about the future.
So, did any of you happy-go-lucky assclowns get a fortune that seems deeply inappropriate to you recently? Maybe something like:
Some Other Fortune Cookie wrote:The thought of what could go wrong tomorrow fills you with nauseous dread.
Because I think we got 'em switched.

Adam

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 5:05 pm
by Vitriola
I don't remember if I posted it on here, but the one fortune I got that really creeped me out and was much more appropriate to Robb was "Innocence is like a flower - more precious when crushed".

My last one said my new outlook draws people to me, although I think they meant my new bed draws cats like flies and the snakes are looking rather shifty, too.

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 5:05 pm
by Vitriola
Oh, and, anything you want to talk about?

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 5:14 pm
by Roody_Yogurt
My last one said team work is good or something shitty like that. It's like, whatever, beyatch, I'll write my OWN DAMN FORTUNE COOKIES!!

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 6:20 pm
by pinback
Vitriola wrote:Oh, and, anything you want to talk about?
YES, but you never reply to my AIMs.

Why do you never reply to my AIMs, VitriolaX?

R U M4D @ M3?????!!!!! :( :( =( =(

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 7:34 pm
by Ice Cream Jonsey
pinback wrote:
Vitriola wrote:Oh, and, anything you want to talk about?
YES, but you never reply to my AIMs.

Why do you never reply to my AIMs, VitriolaX?

R U M4D @ M3?????!!!!! :( :( =( =(
She's on the latest version of Trillian. I'll bet she doesn't even get them.

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 7:49 pm
by pinback
Well, that ain't such a good program, then, is it?

VX, I have tried to message you four separate times in the last two months, and apparently you have received none of them.

Short of picking up a telephone or emailing you or writing you a letter and dropping it in a mailbox or delivering a message through Robb or moving back to Colorado, I'm not sure how I'm supposed to contact you, given these restrictions.

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 8:27 pm
by Worm
Hey, Trillian is a fine program. It's even stopped crashing!

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 8:41 pm
by Ice Cream Jonsey
pinback wrote:or moving back to Colorado
We can make it work this time, baby. I GUARANTEE I can get you into where I work.

We already know you're a genius at Java. What is your take on "extreme programming"?

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 8:42 pm
by Ice Cream Jonsey
I mean think about it! Lunch EVERY DAY! You wouldn't have to get drunk at the back bars on those little "HOORAY BEER" squashed can beers, but if you wanted to you could do it with your pal Jonsey. And the Milker.

I've checked work for weasels and can't find any.

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 9:29 pm
by pinback
Ice Cream Jonsey wrote: We already know you're a genius at Java. What is your take on "extreme programming"?
If memory serves, this involves being within 20 feet of other human beings, right?

Well. I mean. Do we even need to discuss this?

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 9:30 pm
by pinback
Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:those little "HOORAY BEER" squashed can beers
What is this a reference to?

Posted: Tue May 17, 2005 9:39 pm
by Ice Cream Jonsey
pinback wrote:
Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:those little "HOORAY BEER" squashed can beers
What is this a reference to?
The TV ads on last night during that one fuck's career ending performance where a Jamaican guy sells beer in little squashed-down bottles and ends his commercial with "HOORAY BEER!"

Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 4:03 am
by Vitriola
Trillian has one thing to do: SEND MESSAGES. An important sub-duty is to RECEIVE MESSAGES. I think we can safely say that I'll be booting up AIM, ICQ and Yahoo! separately again in the future.

Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 7:05 pm
by AArdvark
What is your take on "extreme programming"?
You mean doing a job in three hours that had a working schedule of three weeks?

that's called milking the quote.


THE
MUST BE A GOVERNMENT
POSITION
AARDVARK

Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 8:53 pm
by pinback
Wait.

Wait.

Jonsey, do they really encourage (or impose?!) "X-Treme Programming" where you work?

Do they REALLY??

Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 10:01 pm
by Ice Cream Jonsey
pinback wrote:Wait.

Wait.

Jonsey, do they really encourage (or impose?!) "X-Treme Programming" where you work?

Do they REALLY??
Yes. Well, we are building to that. It's not going on right now because the tech lead is so much better at Java than the rest of us. He can only teach things. In the sessions I've sat down with him I can only mention typos or say things like, "Try Find->in Files."

But to be fair, Eclipse does a lot of checking for you.

But there is more to extreme programming than two people sitting down and one person typing shit up.

Posted: Thu May 19, 2005 5:39 am
by pinback
Like what?

Posted: Thu May 19, 2005 8:33 am
by Ice Cream Jonsey
You get to "bid" on projects!

Posted: Thu May 19, 2005 8:35 am
by pinback
What a bunch of horseshit.

You know, here's another X-TREME way of getting projects done! Assign them to people, get deadlines for it, and then if they don't do it, fire their ass and get someone else! Isn't that X-TREME!?!!

My God, it could revolutionize the entire industry.