Jolt Country

On July 4, 2005, I will reveal the true identity of Knuckles the Clown.

Mark your calendars.

I'll annouce it at anytime for $5. Fuck you pinback, this is all I have, and the rest of these dorks said no. Go talk to your palm trees and make believe customers you Jimmy Buffett wannabe

I was told, and it didn't ruin the mystery for me. :(

Just 28 days left!

Set your Tivos!

I shall reveal who Knuckles really is....

Screw this, I'm scooping Pinback on this one. Here's Knuckles:

pinback wrote:On July 4, 2005, I will reveal the true identity of Knuckles the Clown.

Mark your calendars.

I'll trump pinner by two weeks. (Drum roll. . . .) Here's the true identity of Knuckles the Clown:

BWHAHAHA you linked a picture of an unappealing person, 2 weeks after somebody did the same exact thing. BEST OF!!!

Not just unappealing, he's also a RACIST.

clown>sandwich

I'm Knuckles the Clown

Only a couple more weeks to go, at which time I will announce Knuckles the Clown's true identity.

And then never, ever, post on this BBS again.

So, you see, there's two things to look forward to.

Fuck you. I'm not losing my two best posters at the same time. If you want to leave because you can't discuss shit here then just go you fucking weeping ovary.

Sorry, bro. Nothing can be done to stop this.

Enjoy the next couple weeks, that's all I can say. Embrace them.

yeah, you MIGHT leave this haven.

I think the draw, the lure of posting will be harder to break than those 40+ cigarettes you deny you smoke each day. Harder to breeak than the alcohol thats keeping you a single, morose, not-getting-any-in-your-palm-infested-apartment kind of guy.
Oh, wait it's NOT Pinback..Sorry I'm sure.



THE
WHOOPSIE
AARDVARK

(those things MIGHT still apply tho...)

pinback wrote:Sorry, bro. Nothing can be done to stop this.

Enjoy the next couple weeks, that's all I can say. Embrace them.

Look. I can't have an opinion on here. My job is to be everybody's friend and let them know that the administrator is not asking them to leave. You want to have meaningful conversations, well, I can't on here. Because to be meaningful you must disagree.

And I can't disagree with people without yelling. I GUESS. There are sometimes cases where I can, like the Brewers fan who was on here. I figured that was a drive-by post so no big deal if I offended somebody over it.

Plus, you're very mean. If people disagree with you then you turn your acid tongue on them very quickly. And yes, I realize I do the same thing on your bulletin boards and you do what I do.

I don't know what you're talking about, ICJ. I think you do a fine job. I'm not doing this out of spite.

I leave here not angry or remorseful, but instead enriched by the years of memories and good times which this place has given me. I only hope in some small way I've been able to return the favor, even if just a little bit.

But the fact remains: 7/4/05, Knuckles gets outed, and I leave here forever.

Really, this time.

These things won't happen. I won't let them happen.

Why are you leaving?

These things WILL happen. I'm trying to think of how you could stop them from happening.

HOW TO STOP ME FROM OUTING KNUCKLES:
----------------------------------------------
1. Somebody announces it ahead of time (which is fine.)

2. You DELETE any posts of mine which contain the answer. But you'd never do this, because people who delete posts should be LOCKED UP 4 LIFE!!!

3. You travel to Herndon, VA, and kill me before 7/4. (I'll pay you $1000 cash to do this, BTW.)

4. You pay me off, in some form or another. I'm not thinking a night of sweaty monkey sex with your girlfriend specifically here. It could be anything.

5. You shut the BBS down. (Again, fine.)


HOW TO STOP ME FROM LEAVING THIS BBS
---------------------------------------------
1. See 4, above.

2. Well, technically, see 3 and 5 above, but in these cases, I'm still never posting again.


So, there are your options. Good luck.

pinback wrote:These things WILL happen. I'm trying to think of how you could stop them from happening.

2. You DELETE any posts of mine which contain the answer. But you'd never do this, because people who delete posts should be LOCKED UP 4 LIFE!!!

Oh, you got that right.

3. You travel to Herndon, VA, and kill me before 7/4.

Not a prob--

(I'll pay you $1000 cash to do this, BTW.)

... lem.

4. You pay me off, in some form or another. I'm not thinking a night of sweaty monkey sex with your girlfriend specifically here. It could be anything.

So if I get you laid, by some OTHER girl (Jesus, there's like 3 billion of them, no, you can't get with mine) you will either keep posting here, not tell everyone Knuckles is really me and/or both. Okay.