[Gamez Review] Dream Match Tennis
Posted: Mon Jul 25, 2005 3:35 pm
The game: Dream Match Tennis
Here is a game which is impossible to criticize. It has an unassailable defense which provides an impenetrable barrier to negative commentary. Here, watch as I attempt to criticize the game:
First of all, this game is as bare bones as can be. I mean, it's got one mode, "Exhibition", where you just play one match, win or lose. Then the other mode, "Challenge", which just means you play four matches in a row. That's it. That's the whole game. In 2005, how can a game developer think that this is acceptab---- IT'S $4.95.
See how it did that? Watch, I'll try again...
And even in "challenge" mode, since there are only four characters, and you have to play four matches, in one of the matches you're PLAYING YOURSE---- IT'S $4.95.
Damn. That is one tough nut. But I think I can crack it.
Also, nice job on the variety of gameplay options. Let's see, you can play with a big ball or a small ball, aaaaand.... well, that's about i---- $4.95.
Shit. Well, I give up.
The good parts of the game are, the sound is excellent, the gameplay (what there is of it) is HIGHLY satisfying, and is actually the best tennis simulation I've ever played on a computer, and I've played three, one of which was Pong. And of all the other indie games I've mentioned recently on this site so far, with the exception of Trash, I've played Dream Match Tennis more than all the others combined.
...and it's only $4.9---- $4.95!!
Here is a game which is impossible to criticize. It has an unassailable defense which provides an impenetrable barrier to negative commentary. Here, watch as I attempt to criticize the game:
First of all, this game is as bare bones as can be. I mean, it's got one mode, "Exhibition", where you just play one match, win or lose. Then the other mode, "Challenge", which just means you play four matches in a row. That's it. That's the whole game. In 2005, how can a game developer think that this is acceptab---- IT'S $4.95.
See how it did that? Watch, I'll try again...
And even in "challenge" mode, since there are only four characters, and you have to play four matches, in one of the matches you're PLAYING YOURSE---- IT'S $4.95.
Damn. That is one tough nut. But I think I can crack it.
Also, nice job on the variety of gameplay options. Let's see, you can play with a big ball or a small ball, aaaaand.... well, that's about i---- $4.95.
Shit. Well, I give up.
The good parts of the game are, the sound is excellent, the gameplay (what there is of it) is HIGHLY satisfying, and is actually the best tennis simulation I've ever played on a computer, and I've played three, one of which was Pong. And of all the other indie games I've mentioned recently on this site so far, with the exception of Trash, I've played Dream Match Tennis more than all the others combined.
...and it's only $4.9---- $4.95!!