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Hey Jonsey!

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 9:27 am
by Worm
Starforce issues a challenge. Prove it!

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 10:40 am
by Ice Cream Jonsey
What a load of horseshit. They know they're incompetent, we know they're incompetent, they then used an obvious fallacy in computer engineering to make it sound like they're somehow not a bunch of rank amateurs who have no idea what their lousy code is doing to people's hardware.

There have been a lot of rumors in the Internet concerning DVD/CD writers malfunction after installation and star-up of StarForce protected applications. Some have even mentioned that should such “malfunctioning” drive be placed in any other PC without StarForce protection installed it will fail to work as well.
So... they are not saying that their comedy of code breaks the functionality of DVD/CD drives... they're saying that if you rip it out and put it on a new system that it won't work THERE either.

What a load of horseshit! How many fucking people have four of five PCs around their house to test this shit on? Like it's FREAKING OKAY for the functionality of hardware dying on a system it was otherwise working fine on. Unbelievable.

In the past year our staff and many of our clients tried restlessly to reproduce the matter based on these rumors. Using our hardware collection we assembled systems alike, but such problems never took place. Therefore, we have no proven facts of such issues and we have found out that all of these rumors are false.
Okay. But they are admitting that their software DOES break DVD & CD writers at the driver level. Fantastic. Of course, we knew that years ago.

We have serious reasons to believe that such problems are pure fiction.
Other examples of pure fiction: Me ever buying a game with Starforce on it, any major game ever daring to use their childishly designed copy protection, etc.

However, if such problem does exist, it should be repeatable. Therefore, just to make sure, StarForce decided to have a worldwide contest among users of StarForce protected applications.
This is great. "It should work on one of our systems!!! Da!"


Anyone who can reproduce and demonstrate the mentioned above problem with CD/DVD drive in our office will receive $3000.00 US. You should arrive in our office with your PC or use any of our PCs and reproduce the problem. If you can be the first to reproduce this situation in our office, we will be happy to award you with $3000.00 US, cover your trip to Moscow and pay 2 days’ lodging.
Three thousand dollars to go to Moscow. You could make it a million dollars and I wouldn't step foot into a lawless third world nation under conditions that are, by definition, somewhat hostile.

Also, I liked how it was $1000 yesterday. They want you to go to Russia without knowing what kind of system they have there and then what, just eat the expense when the one CD writer they happen to have doesn't fry itself on the specific driver they'll develop for this? $1000 probably seemed like a million dollars to these assholes and they had to awkwardly up it when they were told how much money that's not.

These guys need to shut the fuck up. Their software has never stopped piracy on any game, they're bad at what they do, they break software, no real publisher will touch them and everyone hates them. Go to their forum, though and they are cocky as shit. This is going to end very badly for them.

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 12:15 pm
by co
icj wrote:Three thousand dollars to go to Moscow. You could make it a million dollars and I wouldn't step foot into a lawless third world nation under conditions that are, by definition, somewhat hostile.
My parents went on a cruise through russia and several other passengers got mugged while in Moscow. Apparently, groups of gypsies run into the tourists and grab everything they have.

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 12:22 pm
by Ice Cream Jonsey
co wrote:
icj wrote:Three thousand dollars to go to Moscow. You could make it a million dollars and I wouldn't step foot into a lawless third world nation under conditions that are, by definition, somewhat hostile.
My parents went on a cruise through russia and several other passengers got mugged while in Moscow. Apparently, groups of gypsies run into the tourists and grab everything they have.
Jesus! I thought I was exaggerating when I said it was a third world shithole. Now I have righteous fury!

You have gained a level of righteous fury. -- ... ???

I'm sure one of the many Russian Spam Bots will be around shortly to defend the empire. One of the biggest and most powerful countries in history and all they are now is a source of retro hockey jerseys, brides and pyramid scheme spam.

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 1:53 pm
by Yulia593@DC
Hi my friend!!!

My name is Yulia, me of 29 years, I live in Russia, in city St. Peterburg
is one of the most beautiful cities in Russia. I love walks on fresh air, I
like to go in for sports and to conduct an active way of life, I like to
prepare for various tasty dishes.
I very romantic and cheerful girl, I adore animals, is especial cats and
dogs.
I search to myself of the partner in life for creation of serious
relations. My purpose in life to create strong, amicable family, and to
have children. This person should have such qualities as noble, honesty, to
have sense of humour and, undoubtedly, will love me and will fill my life
by happiness and love. If my letter of you has interested, write on my
email : girl_zhdan@fromru.com

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 4:35 pm
by Ice Cream Jonsey
Yulia593@DC wrote:Hi my friend!!!

My name is Yulia, me of 29 years, I live in Russia, in city St. Peterburg
is one of the most beautiful cities in Russia. I love walks on fresh air, I
like to go in for sports and to conduct an active way of life, I like to
prepare for various tasty dishes.
I very romantic and cheerful girl, I adore animals, is especial cats and
dogs.
I search to myself of the partner in life for creation of serious
relations. My purpose in life to create strong, amicable family, and to
have children. This person should have such qualities as noble, honesty, to
have sense of humour and, undoubtedly, will love me and will fill my life
by happiness and love. If my letter of you has interested, write on my
email : girl_zhdan@fromru.com
This is the best thing that has ever come out of Russia.

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 4:41 pm
by Die, perfidious Jews!
Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:This is the best thing that has ever come out of Russia.
Except for pogroms, natch.

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 5:03 pm
by Vitriola
Yulia593@DC wrote:I like to prepare for various tasty dishes.
Me, too! I might even put on a skirt. Depends on how much he's spending, and if I get my own bottle of wine.

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 5:12 pm
by AArdvark
Yulia....She's probably got more hair than Robin Williams.


How does one take a cruise through Moscow? I was unaware of any major bodies of water running through the city.. Oh wait after further review (google) there is a river of sorts..


THE
FLOAT MY BOATSKI
AARDVARK

Posted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 7:43 pm
by Ice Cream Jonsey
The river is still running red with dissident blood.

Posted: Wed Dec 28, 2005 5:02 pm
by Lysander
I want a clarification on whether Uliad Photo Studio or whatever is actually from Russia or if it's a reg joking around.

Posted: Wed Dec 28, 2005 10:14 pm
by Ice Cream Jonsey
I hope it was not a reg messing around, because it was perfect.

The Russians need to get invaded by China so the Great Firewall can be extended over there as well. What a bunch of animals. (No offense to any real Russians who may be reading.)