Jolt Country

Ok, It never fails; every day Robb and I go to lunch at our favorite sandwich spot, the people of Englewood Colorado resort to a mindless existence while at lunch. They leave their brains in someone’s mini skirt back at work.

This happening sandwich joint never fails has lines out the door. Now to make a bad situation worse, it appears the mindless people create the issue themselves. Today, we have 2 registers with one line forming for them both. Robb and I sit and ponder if we should be the brave one and let the soccer mommy in front of us know that it is ok to line up before either register 1 or 2 so everyone can get out of the door way and get their lunch and carry on with the hassles of trying to get out of the parking lot.

So with this, I bring to you the REGISTER POLL!

Yes, we could go to another sandwich shop, but just the thought of eating from a place that combines the words Jimmy and John makes ones intestines rumble and mouth salivate for the hot beef injection.

Ok, kidding, but this place has the best sandwiches around town and the bread is damn good. It is unfortunate they attract the 30 something business professional that has barely left the mothers teet long enough to ponder the idea of brain functionality.

Oh how I pity how you have to eat everyday in that state. I cannot beleive there are fat people in Colorado considering the dining options. I don't wait in lines for anything anymore. Any wait of substantial length is due to incompetence on somebodies part, like having a busy lunch spot with two registers.

I think anyone who enters within a 15 mile radius of a Tech Center between the hours of 7am and 7pm without being employed in said Tech Center should be shot a hundred times in the face machine gun "tracer" ammo, immediately followed by a hundred rounds of machine gun ammo.

Honestly, we're talking about a lack of absolute convenience here. Robb, why don't you just whip out the GPX2 while your in line and ... oh, yeah.

Yeah, that brings up another point. You could have the most convenient thing in the world and some dumb shit will ruin it for everyone else.

Take 7-11, you would think it is a place you could, get a cold beverage, pay the guy and be on your way. Nope, not anymore. Never fails you have the person doing their grocery shopping at 7-11 or you have a customer in line that can't decide what flavor of tar they want today.

My favorite is having to wait at 7-11 for them to get cash from their little machine for a twenty dollar bill.

This fits into my theory that Homeland Security is just another way to totally inconvenience the populace when technologies could be used to make a line at the damn airport actually move.

Another convenience turned bad these days. Gas Stations.

No longer can you go to the gas station, swipe your credit card and be on your way. You have to wait for the guy at the pump on the cell phone to find the hand to eye coordination to line up the gas nozzle to the valve on the car. Once that is complete, he has to reprimand the 20 kids in the car that are acting like heathens and then figure out how to screw back on the gas cap.

If you give people convenience, they will find a way to make it inconvenient for everyone around them. Go out today and see what I mean. Start just pulling out of your neighborhood. If it is like my neighborhood, you will have the soccer mommies standing at the mailbox telling everyone to slow down.

We live in a me society and not we!

Ah, or when you need to have someone pump your gas. Should you explain to him that "topping off" does nothing? That you might able to use the change? Imagine if he tries to argue the science of topping off, you might just strangle him with the gas hose and then they'll call you the murderer.

You guys should man up and make your own fucking sandwiches, honestly. You can make it a gay process, like one day milker will make sandwiches for both of you, and then robb takes the next day, then you exchange tips. How fun!

This is the whiniest thread I've ever seen on this BBS, and I include my old Army of Love posts in that distinction.

I do carry a big beef sandwich with me!

As for whining, you should hear said dumb people whine when you point out the obvious to them.

"Excuse me miss, there are 2 registers and yes, there can be 2 lines behind each of them so that people may enter the door". (Lady, puts down cell phone) Are you kidding me, my phone call and me getting to the register faster then 20 people behind me are more important.

No whining here, just common sense and yes a little bit of a rant.

I hear we have a new common sense President hopeful. How long will that last? Give him a cell phone, that will change all that.

That is a good idea worm!

If you worked here, would you want your sandwich with man juice?

I do like me a sandwich my friend. All that hot beef between a bun! Dripping with succulent sauces and pubic like lettuce.

Just the thought of a 12 inch sub sinking within my gullet really makes a man protrude in the ram rod department.

Cook your meat!

Worm wrote:Honestly, we're talking about a lack of absolute convenience here. Robb, why don't you just whip out the GPX2 while your in line and ... oh, yeah.

In case anyone doesn't know, I left my gp2x in the crapper last Friday and it was gone when I came in again. I worked the Saturday, so it wasn't even like it had the whole weekend to disappear, just a matter of hours. I should make this place a pay forum for that crack. ("For everyone"?) No, just for Worm.

Worm wrote:You guys should man up and make your own fucking sandwiches, honestly. You can make it a gay process, like one day milker will make sandwiches for both of you, and then robb takes the next day, then you exchange tips. How fun!

In all seriousness, I've been meaning to buy a couple loaves of bread from those guys and make my own. Do you know why I haven't? Do you know, Worm? Because I only go at lunchtime, and I sure as shit am not going to be the person asking to take bread off the cart to sell to me and make everyone behind me wait until the next batch is ready. That's why.

Every fucking time we go in there they have to change the register tape, too. The place is only open from 11-3. With Colorado passing the "No Register Change After 2:00pm" law, it ruins the experience for all of us.

pinback wrote:This is the whiniest thread I've ever seen on this BBS, and I include my old Army of Love posts in that distinction.

We're going to get our money's worth, too. This thread will be so bad that the anonymous attacks from lurkers who hold us ... me ... in contempt will start. (We're about due for one of those anyway.) I GUARANTEE it.

You guys sure are bread aficionados. Why don't you get a bread machine, or just buy bread at the store?

Worm wrote:Why don't you just buy bread at the store?

I've been meaning to buy a couple loaves of bread from those guys and make my own. Do you know why I haven't? Do you know, Worm? Because I only go at lunchtime, and I sure as shit am not going to be the person asking to take bread off the cart to sell to me and make everyone behind me wait until the next batch is ready. That's why.

Yeah. You want it so bad, maybe. I dunno, go in on a weekend? Call ahead? Pay ahead? Ask your wimmin to pick it up for you? Eat normal fucking bread(the horror)? Honestly, this isn't as much of an impossibility as you make it out to be.

you fuckers, nobody posts for weeks. Then all of a sudden 15 in one thread and I can't follow cause I only have a attention span of about a 3 posts . CURSE YOU!

Knuckles, just buy your brother a loaf of bread. He's apparently UNABLE.

Worm wrote:Knuckles, just buy your brother a loaf of bread. He's apparently UNABLE.

Not true: I am in negotiations to get that old 80s arcade classic BREADMASTER, the one that features a slide-in oven instead of a joystick.

Off Topic

My brother is just too nice. I really think if they charged him for his meal at this shithole he goes to lunch at, and just handed him a reciept and told him to leave (sans horrible meal he has tricked himself into thinking would be good) he would. Robb doesn't like public confrontation. Or asking for what he really wants. Not taking a shot, just sometimes I think you feel too much pressure from the people behind you in line and you end up with a shitty lunch or something.

I've been so disapointed in the dining out expierecne (see LARGE MEALS I'VE HAVE NOT ENJOYED) I just call up a place and tell them how to cook without being obnoxious about. When I order a pizza I just say "make it well done" 4 words. However your normal dick would order it " BNAAAAA LAST TIME IT WAS TOO DOUGHY BNAAAAAA" People understand you like things different at restuarants but they also make minimum wage. So the key is to get your point across without inciting teenage angst.


Robb,

Order the fucking loaves of bread turn around and scream "gawk you assholes, I'm ordering extra loaves" take a dump on the counter and leave.