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The Permutations of Being Human

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 10:44 am
by RetroRomper
May 21st, October 21st: the rapture, doomsday, the supposed climatic finale to humanity, came and went. Everyone joked, had an opinion, or looked up at the sky with a forelonging gaze hoping for something greater to touch them and shift the existence they believed to be unmovable except by God, or a divine fsscimile there of. But here I am, sitting at a McDonald's pondering the corporate rationale that made it policy to put the cream and sugar into my coffee before I ever codled it in my sleep deprived hands, and across the room is the bearded, quite and quietly desperate human being that marked down the days till the rapture on a chalk sign and every morning, made a new batch of fliers that warned me that "The End Will Be in 17 Days!"

With a hunched over and resigned slant to his posture, his eyes are downcast to his food and coffee, lost in a constantly tired, world of one. His head is slouched toward the table, working on a cross word puzzle, a letter to himself or perhaps the long dead or separated wife that is now merely represented by a simple, polished gold ring on his finger.

It's odd, the world is in a constant state of ending where some other power is going to make things right for everyone, and instead of seeing that, all I see is a man who regardless of his personality, history, tragedy or majesty in life, perhaps only wished for something different. Something to break the routine and constant struggle and journey that is life. The proper term would be that he wished to be "saved," but that assumes there was no power in him, no struggle or will behind his thoughts and his life.

Now all he can do is go about and repeat the actions that have defined him, until for whatever reason, he is unable to do so. The greater idea, the power inherent and his ability to to be the messenger of something greater, has passed.

What is left is human. Flawed. And has maybe accepted that this will be his life from here on out.

There is something more to the idea that we can't save ourselves, that this is how it always will be and all we can do is accept it... Hope, faith, and awareness that there is something more than ourselves, are what I see permeating that idea. But what can I do? Give him a few dollars and silently wonder after him, finding an aspect, an idea kn him, that he turned to God to feel.

That is life perhaps... Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps...

Re: The Permutations of Being Human

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 2:26 pm
by realitymccheck
RetroRomper wrote:But here I am, sitting at a McDonald's pondering the corporate rationale that made it policy to put the cream and sugar into my coffee before I ever codled it in my sleep deprived hands,
duh, just ask for them "on the side" when they ask you about cream and sugar.

other helpful McDonalds tips:
- Ask for burgers "hot off the grill" and then enjoy watching the cashier walk back and yell "hot for that one" and then when you taste your sandwich thank me in your mind for telling you this secret
- ask for fries "with no salt" to ensure that #1 they are hot and fresh and just came up and #2 you can choose how much salt to put on those things

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 3:24 pm
by pinback
Yeah cuz nothing makes McDonald's customers and employees happier than some knucklehead coming in with a bunch of special requests.

Just eat your goddamn hamburger and move on.

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 4:39 pm
by AArdvark
I miss the onions cooked on the meat, and the 100 percent animal lard they used to use.

Anyway, I liked the contemplations about the disillusioned nutter. Please to post more observations about the world in general.



THE
POINT OF VIEW
AARDVARK

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 5:40 pm
by mcrealitycheck
pinback wrote:Yeah cuz nothing makes McDonald's customers and employees happier than some knucklehead coming in with a bunch of special requests.

Just eat your goddamn hamburger and move on.
yea, cuz steam drawer meat and brown fries will keep mickey dees rolling in business. It didn't used to be like this, the steam drawer system didn't show up till about ten years ago and the meat comes out cool and soggy. I'm saving them from themselves.

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 5:44 pm
by AArdvark
It's too late. I was there when the microwaves were rolled in and nothing was the same after that.



THE
McDOOMED
AARDVARK

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 7:06 pm
by pinback
mcrealitycheck wrote:
pinback wrote:Yeah cuz nothing makes McDonald's customers and employees happier than some knucklehead coming in with a bunch of special requests.

Just eat your goddamn hamburger and move on.
yea, cuz steam drawer meat and brown fries will keep mickey dees rolling in business. It didn't used to be like this, the steam drawer system didn't show up till about ten years ago and the meat comes out cool and soggy. I'm saving them from themselves.
JUST EAT THE GODDAMN HAMBURGER AND MOVE ON.

FUCK!!!

Re: The Permutations of Being Human

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 7:23 pm
by realitymcughcheck
realitymccheck wrote:other helpful McDonalds tips:
- Ask for burgers "hot off the grill" and then enjoy watching the cashier walk back and yell "hot for that one" and then when you taste your sandwich thank me in your mind for telling you this secret
- ask for fries "with no salt" to ensure that #1 they are hot and fresh and just came up and #2 you can choose how much salt to put on those things
The kid knows what "secret menu" to actually order off of since if you look closely, he gorged himself on nothing but off the menu items from In and Out.
RetroRomper wrote:In & Out:
Four by Four Animal Style.
French Fries Animal Style.
Napoleon Shake.
He also knew that McDonald's is basically just a repository for chicken McNuggets and sugary deserts
RetoRomper wrote:McDonald's:
Three Apple Pies
Vanilla Ice Cream Cone
Either order off the menu at McDonald's and hope they don't spit on your burger because the fry cooks will actually have to work, or do the same at In and Out and get decent food. Priorities, man, Priorities

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2011 9:10 pm
by pinback
You are all fucking maggots. I had a quarter pounder with cheese, STRAIGHT OFF THE MENU, a few weeks ago, and it was goddamn DELICIOUS.

I swear, if any of you screaming queens could take your ego out of the equation for two fucking seconds, you might actually enjoy a meal at McDonald's, but you're so goddamn busy smirking and smugly suggesting everyone else in there read a book that you're missing one of life's simplest pleasures.

If In-n-Out isn't the most overrated cult-of-the-mind(*) in the universe, then the universe is larger than we thought.



(*) I'm not saying it's bad, it's very good. Is it as good as the lines around the block at 2 AM would indicate? No. NO IT IS NOT. Hamburger Habit, also in SoCal, is just as good, and no lines.

And no goddamn bible verses on the fucking packaging. Fucking maggots.

FUCK!!!!!

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2011 3:04 am
by AArdvark
This diet challenge is starting to get to you, huh. Maybe a topic that doesn't involve food would be better.


I whisht they'd bring back the McDLT. I know the angus is close and all, but back in the day they were teh bomb!


THE
CAME WITH AN
INSTRUCTION BOOKLET
AARDVARK