Jolt Country

Everybody, everybody - shut up and click this:

http://www.pez.com/products/index.php?type=subcat&ID=80

Holy shit! AMERICAN PRESIDENTS PEZ! Are you fucking KIDDING me? And they are gonna do more volumes! I am gonna get a chance for TAFT PEZ! The candy William Howard Taft would himself eat if only he were alive!

This is the greatest development in the history of western civilization. The William Henry Harrison pez dispenser only holds two pez.

Hopefully the Taft one will be a double wide model.

The Hoover one will only dispense half a candy at a time however......



THE
HISTORICAL CONFECTION
AARDVARK

Is it being a bust rather than a head an effort to not be offensive?

I dunno. My gal got me a Green Lantern pez for Christmas and yeah, it pezzes at his torso, not his neck. Unacceptable! On with the Presidents-as-Pez humor or, as I will be calling them, PEZIDENTS

Franklin Delano Roosevelt's pez is FOUR TIMES as long as the others!

A girl at a party met the Calvin Coolidge one once. She said that she made a bet that she could get more than three pez out of Cal.

Silent Cal said, "█ █."

Ronald Reagan's Pez will (a) hold jelly beans and (b) forget where it put them. Jimmy Carter's will dispense peanuts.

John F. Kennedy's will dispense Pez back, and to the left. Back, and to the left. Back, and to the left ...

William McKinley's pez is originally closed shut and only opens up when you take it into Buffalo.

William Henry Harrison's Pez is cold, and stops operating after 30 days.

Bill Clinton's Pez is only partially complete, you have to give it [a] head.

Chester A. Arthur's Pez-bot (is that a word?) will only work for Bruce Willis or Samuel L. Jackson, and then it will explode maple syrup all over the place.


THE
LIVE FREE OR
EAT PEZ
AARDVARK

I presume Barack Obama's Pez is coin operated, because it keeps talking about wanting change.