Jolt Country

Where did your handle come from?

I am mainly asking because Roody and I want to know where Aardvark's handle came from.

To answer this and kick things off - I used to draw a comic book in middle/high school called The Millerster. Rather than respect copyright and come up with my own antagonists, I had one them be "Ice Cream Jonsey". When it came time to pick a fake name at age 15 or whatever, when I started using BBSs, it seemed like that one wouldn't be taken.

Retro Romper's better include a story where he mouth-banged a IIGS.

My story only goes back to the late 90s, in the early days of my-owning-a-cd-burner. You know, the Easy CD Creator days where I had to do little silly things like rip my songs to .wav and burn at not-max speeds just so my cd would end up ok.

Anyhow, one evening, I was putting together a couple albums of Radiohead rarities and live songs for my older brother. While it was burning, we used the insert designer to create a cover for one of the cds. We chose this picture with Thom Yorke in a straight jacket. Instead of calling it a Radiohead album, we decided to re-christen the band "Roody Yogurt and the Fuckfaces." We titled one of the albums "Live from the Shwarzschild Radius", and at least one of them had this backstory about the band hailing from a town called Squeamhurst.

Some time later, I entered the IF Comp, and I thought it'd be more entertaining if my peers at the ifMUD didn't know I entered so I resurrected Roody Yogurt as my pseudonym (I'm awful at keeping secrets, though. I think I lasted three days before telling everyone). Since then, I use the Roody Yogurt name for my IF activities. Just kind of makes sense to have a different persona for the different hats you wear.

My dad was on the cutting edge of home computers in the late 70s/early 80s, and was running a BBS in 1980. I started calling and posting on BBSes when I was nine or ten years old. I am sure it was very annoying to other adults. Anyway, when I first started we had just got our Franklin Ace 1000 computer, so I decided to become "Robbie Franklin," one of the dumbest aliases of all time.

My next choice for an alias was about to be David Lightman (from Wargames) when I found out that there were already 900,000 other people using that name. Instead I went with a character from another one of my favorite movies at the time, Cloak and Dagger. The make believe sidekick of Davey Osbourne (Henry Thomas) was Jack Flack. So when I was 11 and calling BBSes, I became Jack Flack. So many people knew me as Jack Flack that lots of my online friends assumed my first name was really Jack, and we used to get calls at the house all the time for "Jack". My mom eventually got used to it.

I was "Jack Flack" until I started hanging around on IRC in 1994. EfNet had (has) a 9 character limitation, so I couldn't be "Jack_Flack". For a while I experimented with things like Jak_Flak and JackFlack but there were so many other Jack Flack's out there that people were always fighting for the name that I ended up just shortening it to Flack. And because it was IRC, sometimes it was [Flack] and sometimes it was xFLACKx and sometimes it was .xFlackx. and occasionally it was Flackster. But anyway, that's when it got changed from Jack Flack to just Flack.

For what it's worth, I once offered the owner of Flack.com a grand for the name. Now a squatter owns it and the last time I e-mailed them they said they wouldn't sell it for less than $5k. I don't have any tattoos, but I have long considered getting my last name tattooed down the outside of one calf and Flack down the other.

[youtube][/youtube]

Well, ahem, this might not be as exciting as you all might think. It has to do with a small illustration and a lot of self reinforcement. I think I can liven this up with the use of audio and video to make it more entertaining, if that'll help any.

It started back in middle school, or junior high as it was known then. I was a seventh grader and extraordinarily shy and nerdy ( so not much has changed, ha ha!) One of my pastimes was reading EVERYTHING, which included the encyclopedia and dictionary. I actually read the introduction and preface on Webster's abridged; how's that for scary?
This particular dictionary had a shiny red cover with an eagle on it. On the first page the very first illustration was a picture of an aardvark:



For some reason this stuck in my head, don't know why. Soon I was dropping the word aardvark into a LOT of school papers and doodling aardvarks on my notebook covers, which is where Olly got started..


From the 1986 album cover for 'No Beers Involved'...


...to my custom Olly weather-vane



This was around the time I got my very first tape recorder so I was saying a lot of aardvark related things as well. I also had Robin Williams' comedy album:




The one sketch that burned itself into my head was the Mr. Rogers one. I would go around reciting parts of that, only changing it to 'Today we are going to learn about the aardvark'.

You can hear it in this song:https://aardvarklavance.bandcamp.com/tr ... nubar=true

( I had my head in a trash bag full of helium at the time. Really)

Then I got the Monty Python's Contractual Obligation album which had the Bookshop sketch, and also included an aardvark reference...

[youtube][/youtube]

so I was reciting parts of that as well. Unfortunatly I have kept a lot of my tapes of me blathering and making up little comedy sketches. I sounded like rainman, or worse:


(edit: link deleted due to acute embarrassment)

Anyway, when I got a computer and started logging onto boards there was no other choice...


THE
LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT
AARDVARK

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Where did your handle come from?

I would be happy to explain but it would take more than 10 lines.

And to think, I was having a hard time coming up with things I was thankful for!

Recently, I was informed of an old game company called Aardvark Ltd. (http://gamingafter40.blogspot.com/2011/ ... ional.html). It doesn't seem like they were limited to crappy text adventures, so I thought possibly 'Vark was somehow endeared to the company (or its advertisements) at some point. Looking at the above page again, the company seems more British than I first realized.

Anyhow, I especially like the Otto cover.

EDIT: Er, Olly.

Tdarcos wrote:

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Where did your handle come from?

I would be happy to explain but it would take more than 10 lines.

No, it wouldn't. It absolutely would NOT take more than 10 goddamn lines.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:

Tdarcos wrote:

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Where did your handle come from?

I would be happy to explain but it would take more than 10 lines.

No, it wouldn't. It absolutely would NOT take more than 10 goddamn lines.

Okay, since you're so smart, you tell me, in less than 10 lines. You know so fucking much and know absolutely, you tell me.

It's short for Tansin Andorian Darcos.
OH
YEAH
HOWS
MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
ASS
TASTE
COMMANDER
TDARCOS

Now the question is, why did he choose such a handle as that?


THE
TEN LINES OR LESS
AARDVARK

Tansin is a character from his book "In the Matter Of: Instrument of God" who spouts Paul's views.

The character TDR - Tansin A. Darcos - exhaustively explains my reasoning on the subject in Gatekeeper which I don’t need to reiterate here. That gives me yet another excuse to sell my other book to you also.

If we had let him, he would have charged us for the explanation!

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:It's short for Tansin Andorian Darcos.

Try again, it's Arogan, asshole. Which if you had even the slightest fucking clue about what the handle meant and why I created it, you would know why it couldn't be "Andorian".

Tdarcos wrote:

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:It's short for Tansin Andorian Darcos.

Try again, it's Arogan, asshole. Which if you had even the slightest fucking clue about what the handle meant and why I created it, you would know why it couldn't be "Andorian".

All three names six letters (666). First and last are combinations of math functions. Arogan short for "Arrogant".

I can explain that name in two lines.

pinback wrote:I can explain that name in two lines.

I can Name That Tune in three notes.

Wow, SOMEbody is having a grumpy moment...

Tdarcos wrote:

pinback wrote:

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:There's no quizzes though, right?

I realize now that my question could have sounded like a quiz, depending on what you attach "which only I know" to.

Let me rephrase:

I would like him to explain the meaning of his full fake name. Here is his full fake name, which only I know:

TANSIN AROGAN DARCOS

I do not, however, know the meaning, which is why I asked the question.

I made up the name because

(1) I was a big fan of the Fortran Language, and three of the mathematical functions were (A) double-precision arccosine, which, because Fortran 66 has a 6-character name size limit, was "Darcos", (B) the functions for tangent and sine, TAN and SIN, respectively.

(2) I wanted to create a name with 6 letters in each word, to "thumb my nose" at those people who think the Antichrist woul be someone who has a name with 6 letters in each of their three names. And he causeth all, both small and great, rich and poor, free and bond, to receive a mark in their right hand, or in their foreheads: And that no man might buy or sell, save he that had the mark, or the name of the beast, or the number of his name. Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man; and his number is Six hundred threescore and six
- Revelation 13:16-18

(3) I wanted the middle name to start with A. You may or may not remember this, Ben, I had a contest on every BBS in the general area offering a prize for someone who could think of a name starting with A that was 6 letters. I don't know if someone thought of it, or I did, but I decided on the word "arrogant" only drop one R and cut it at 6 letters.

"And now you know, the rest of the story."
- Paul Harvey

And you may remember my old sign-off:

Paul Robinson is "Tdarcos, the Standard of Immorality" or
Tansin Arogan Darcos of the District of Columbia territory of the United States
"Grind our enemes into the dust, and drown them in their own gore."
"Exploiting humanity since 1983."
"Above all else... We shall go on..."
"...And continue!"

I think it's been ten years since I used that.

http://www.joltcountry.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=6317

Tdarcos wrote:

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:It's short for Tansin Andorian Darcos.

Try again, it's Arogan, asshole. Which if you had even the slightest fucking clue about what the handle meant and why I created it, you would know why it couldn't be "Andorian".

Well, dickmuncher, it looks like multiple people including yourself have managed to explain your shitty handle in under ten lines. This was your fucking "perpetual machine" and yet we live in a world where it was invented.

I don't even see how you could make it take more than a sentence. You'd have to add five paragraphs of song and movie lyrics, and who would be so crazy and spergy to do that??

For the month of December I will be limiting my posts to ten lines to show bitches how it's done.