Holiday weekend

[AArdvark]

Funny how a holiday weekend consists (for me) all the jobs that I don't get around to during the regular evenings and Sundays.
I admit that I'd get bored if there wasn't some kind of of project for me to work on during my off time. Lately that's been 'Zelda: A link to the past' on an SNES emulator with my PS3 controller. But I feel guilty playing it because I'm not 'accomplishing' anything. But two hours a night isn't really enough time to get household stuff done.
So Memorial day comes upon us and it's time for:

)Open the pool!
Scoop all the (most of) dead leaves and pond scum off the winter cover, this includes those weird little water bugs that get in there. They look like aliens and probably are. Every spring I save the world from an invasion but I never realize it.
Hook up all the hoses and filters and things and get that going while I pour in copious quantities of chemicals that are usually found around derailed trains and old German concentration camps.
Vacuum out the sediment that the pool cover is supposed to prevent but somehow never does. I blame the alien water bugs for that.
Lastly, throw in the plastic yellow duck with the thermometer up it's ass that tells me it's still way too early to be opening the pool.

)Assemble the new grill!
This is a bonus job, mainly because we received a check that we had no idea was coming. The old grill is five years past it's prime and literally falling apart, so we were due.
Some assembly required! This is a cover phrase for: "Hope you good with tools, you American Joe. Love, China"
( Why is it that all those little stickers that say 'Made in China' are printed in the U.S.?)
Luckily I am a mechanical fucking genius (with an awesome set of tools, Dude!) and was able to study the assembled grill in the big box store before we purchased one. I listened to three DR episodes before I was finished if that gives you any timeframe reference. Only two extra screws this time!

) Install the kitchen ceiling fan!
This is also a bonus job, being that it was a pretty big check. Again I was faced with Chinese directions but I am a past master at installing these things so I knew exactly what was involved. Don't even need to turn off the breakers anymore. It's just like 'Operation: that goofy game from Parker Brothers! Don't touch the sides!...ZZZapp!! Buttahfingers! Kidding!
They always give you lots of extra hardware because there's usually two or three ways to hang these things depending on how you do it. I have a drawer full of random screws and washers left over from light fixture installations.
This time it only took only two DR episodes.

) Attend to the lawn!
I purposely found an old (vintage 1941) reel mower. The push kind like grampa used to use. Actually, my mom found it for me last year at a garage sale. I like it better than the power mower because it makes the lawn look like a golf course. And I get my 10,000 steps, or some of them. It's quiet enough so I can listen to DR podcasts while mowing. I still use the self-propelled gas mower when the grass get too high, though.
I weed-whacked the perimeter very neatly cause I have self respect and class and don't want my lawn to have the knee-high-prairie look like my next door neighbors.
I also applied various chemicals that will fertilize grass, kill weeds, eliminate grubs and mutate birds. The lengths we will go for a nice green lawn
Average DR time; one episode. I'm going to start using Don Rogers shows as time references instead of clocks!

There's were also a couple other small projects that I never found time to do before this weekend, like blow all the crap off the driveway with the shop vac. Maple trees are seriously messy!
I was able to do this while seasoning the new cast iron grill grates so timewise I piggybacked this with the grill assembly project.

I stopped every day at five Pm and started drin...relaxing. It IS a holiday weekend, after all.

THE
HOME IMPROVEMENT
AARDVARK

[Flack]

If you find yourself with some free time, head this way. I need to do almost all of those things as well and could use some help. The current challenge is that the wife decided she would mow the lawn with the new riding lawn mower and ran over the corner of the driveway, busting one of the blades.

[AArdvark]

Well, I could maybe get it welded for you but it's all about the free time.
Sounds like you have a lot of cleaning up to do after recent events. I'd be happy to come out and help out...but I have this tornado allergy....


THE
AUNTIE EM!
AARDVARK

[AArdvark]

OK, just kidding about the derailed train comment

[Jizaboz]

The current challenge is that the wife decided she would mow the lawn with the new riding lawn mower and ran over the corner of the driveway, busting one of the blades.

Hahaha. That's not too bad of a fix though, assuming you can convince her to help you lift the lawnmower. My last riding lawnmower I hit a big ass root in my hard at a speed so fast the blade bent AND cut through the mowing deck. Had to beat the hell of out the deck with a hammer to allow clearance for the blade. Next time on the mower, the ignition was dead. So, for the past 8 years or so mowing for me has involved using a cheap push-mower and hating life for a few hours every couple weeks.

[pinback]

The BAAYst CaroLAAAHna!