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EMERGENCY INCIDENT - Calling 9-1-1

Posted: Sat Jan 02, 2016 6:59 am
by Paul Robinson
THIS IS NOT A DRILL - THIS IS NOT A JOKE.

A few minutes ago I had to go to the bathroom and felt like a diarrhea incident. I got into my wheelchair then got to my bathroom. When I removed the diaper it was filled with what appeared to be a mass of blood.

As I wiped myself up I found I have massive bloody diarrhea. This is serious, obviously. I cleaned myself up so I wouldn't look like I had the starring role in The Passion of the Christ and as soon as I put some clothes and a fresh diaper on, I'll assemble my things: my wallet and my bag of medications, and call 9-1-1 to have them bring a bariatric stretcher and take me to the hospital, probably Washington Adventist in Silver Spring.

Further details later.

Posted: Sat Jan 02, 2016 9:15 am
by Well Wisher
Get well soon!

Posted: Sun Jan 03, 2016 10:03 pm
by Ice Cream Jonsey
Didja make it through, Paul?

Posted: Mon Jan 04, 2016 5:56 am
by Flack
How come Donald Ebinsen hasn't commented on this breaking news?

Waaaaait a second...

Posted: Mon Jan 04, 2016 3:09 pm
by bruce
Well, there's no recent hits when you Google "Paul Robinson obituary Silver Spring Maryland".

Bruce

Posted: Mon Jan 04, 2016 3:37 pm
by bruce
Also, you gotta admire the dedication of someone who, when confronted with FECAL BLOOD TORRENT, posts about it here before calling 911.

Posted: Mon Jan 04, 2016 9:33 pm
by Flack
No kidding. Dibs on not touching his keyboard first. Or ever, really.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2016 4:48 pm
by Paul Robinson
bruce wrote:Well, there's no recent hits when you Google "Paul Robinson obituary Silver Spring Maryland".

Bruce
Probably because I live in University Park, Maryland.

The whole story will be in a separate thread.

Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2016 6:38 pm
by Tdarcos
Paul Robinson wrote:
bruce wrote:Well, there's no recent hits when you Google "Paul Robinson obituary Silver Spring Maryland".

Bruce
Probably because I live in University Park, Maryland.

The whole story will be in a separate thread.
http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?acti ... pid=176453

Posted: Wed Jan 06, 2016 10:20 am
by Donald Ebinsen
Flack wrote:How come Donald Ebinsen hasn't commented on this breaking news?

Waaaaait a second...
I have now.
Tdarcos wrote:
Paul Robinson wrote:
bruce wrote:Well, there's no recent hits when you Google "Paul Robinson obituary Silver Spring Maryland".

Bruce
Probably because I live in University Park, Maryland.

The whole story will be in a separate thread.
http://www.caltrops.com/pointy.php?acti ... pid=176453
My god, the son-of-a-bitch is still alive! This guy's escapes from Death's grip remind me of all the times Dick Chaney escaped dying becaise of advances in medical treatment.

This development gives me serious pause and I might not want to stick around with him here.

:)

Posted: Wed Jan 06, 2016 3:55 pm
by AArdvark
Did it look like this?


Image

Posted: Thu Jan 07, 2016 8:07 am
by Tdarcos
AArdvark wrote:Did it look like this?
[image of bloody stepstool]
I wouldn't be surprised, but color the blood the shade of red hair or red velvet chocolate cake mix. Wikipedia's Shades of Red template https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Template:Shades_of_red has several colors that were similar, such as Maroon, Rosewood or Oxblood.

I mean, I peeled the diaper off and it wasn't just spotty, I mean it was covered in a thick paste of blood. And when I was extruding, it was coviering my hands in bloody stools.

A couple of my housemates and the landlord told me when he got back that he had to clean the chair with bleach to remove the stains. I was kind of preoccupied with getting to the hospital, preferrably before I bled to death if I was continuing to bleed internally.