Help.

by **nessman** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 10:02 pm

Vitriola wrote:How is that? Being at one point in my life the kind of pity-party and self-obsessed women she commonly rails against, and rightly so, I've been wondering about this book. How was it? Did it seem to be on track?

Much of the book surprisingly hits the nail right on the head (at least it does from my point of view). The gist of the book is that it tells frustrated wives to lighten up, stop being control freaks, put out more often and to treat their husbands like men instead of children. In return, husbands will resent their wives less and things will be happier.

I can think of quite a few times where if my wife reacted in a way that Dr. Laura suggests - I'd be happy instead of resentful at any given time where she freaked out about someting insignificant.

by **Vitriola** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 8:02 pm

nessman wrote: Prior to that was for a failed attempt at training my wife - "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" by Dr. Laura Schleshinger. She wouldn't listen to me as I read parts of it out loud, but fascinating reading nonetheless.

How is that? Being at one point in my life the kind of pity-party and self-obsessed women she commonly rails against, and rightly so, I've been wondering about this book. How was it? Did it seem to be on track?

by **bruce** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 7:11 pm

Lex wrote:They've given me the confidence to be amasingly wowsingly cool at an interview.

I don't mean to be snide here--no, scratch that, I do mean to be snide here:

So you interviewed terrifically for a job where you were paid in tummy rubs rather than actual currency? You'll excuse me if I ask you what the point was.

Bruce

by **nessman** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 5:45 pm

Knuckles the CLown wrote:If you are not overweight and are over 30 YOU HAVE WON! This society breeds fat cattle. If you are still skinny after 30 years of walking around this smorgasborg, you have attained the rank of Arch-Mage.

Heh heh... Walrustitty... heh heh heh...

Back to the original post...

Last book I bought was "Blue Blood" by Edward Conlon - an autobiography of a Harvard grad turned NYPD cop. Very good reading - almost 600 pages and after two months I'm almost done with it. Prior to that was for a failed attempt at training my wife - "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" by Dr. Laura Schleshinger. She wouldn't listen to me as I read parts of it out loud, but fascinating reading nonetheless. I think the last book I bought prior to that was a reference manual for Sun Solaris 8.

by **Lex** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 2:44 pm

Internal language makes a major difference to how you view yourself and internalise the world. It's a fucking expensive book, but the first book ever written on NLP:

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/de ... s&n=507846

Frogs into Princes. It reads just like a novel, but you find yourself waking up after several pages very, very regularly as opposed to the once-every-six-months of your normal reading. It's written specifically to make that happen, apparently.

It is the first ever written on NLP, and so it's a little bit coarse in certain areas, but because it is so easy to read I strongly recommend it. It will engage you, and you'll want to read more of his stuff, but this is strongly recommended reading.

I only like to read about spaceships: If I can read it and like it, it has to be engaging.

The guy who wrote this is also doing a seminar with Paul Mckenna, the most well-known hypnotist over here. It was torrented a while ago on SA, but I can hook you up with his audio-files on "Supreme Self-Confidence"! This is a form of hypnotism that really works, because it has a lot of NLP within it. I recommend both of these heartily: They've given me the confidence to be amasingly wowsingly cool at an interview.

by **Lex** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 2:44 pm

Hugs!

by **Ice Cream Jonsey** » Fri Jul 09, 2004 7:24 am

pinback wrote:The books are great, you guys are (with the exceptions of Jonsey and Bruce) great

Ah, writing a two-page post on why you're OK is not "helpful." I see. Gotcha.

I'd end this with something pithy, but *I* am I genuinely good per-- no, wait.

by **bruce** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 9:12 pm

Worm wrote:
bruce wrote:
Vitriola wrote:I think people can, and do, change, but never by volition.

Planescape Torment wrote:What can change the nature of a man?
Regret, baby. Regret can change the nature of a man.
Bruce
I always answered "nothing". I didn't lie though.

I always wondered if the answer you gave to that question had any bearing on the plot at all.

'Cos, yeah, I told the truth too.

Bruce

by **Worm** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 9:08 pm

bruce wrote:
Vitriola wrote:I think people can, and do, change, but never by volition.

Planescape Torment wrote:What can change the nature of a man?
Regret, baby. Regret can change the nature of a man.

Bruce

I always answered "nothing". I didn't lie though.

by **bruce** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 9:01 pm

pinback wrote:you guys are (with the exceptions of Jonsey and Bruce) great.

I have a dick here that's not sucking itself, Pinner.

Bruce

by **bruce** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 9:00 pm

Vitriola wrote:I think people can, and do, change, but never by volition.

Planescape Torment wrote:What can change the nature of a man?

Regret, baby. Regret can change the nature of a man.

Bruce

by **bruce** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 8:55 pm

pinback wrote:If given the choice between being funny, being non-boring, and being happy, I'd choose happiness.

You should read Cory Doctorow's Eastern Standard Tribe, or at least the first page of it. It's on www.craphound.com.

Bruce

by **pinback** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 8:55 pm

"Fake it 'til you make it!" - My mother, to me, umpteen times when I expose my "problems" (which, as I am coming to understand, were merely symptoms of the real problem) to her.

To the extent that any/all of you are engaging in this discussion to provide help for me, know that I truly do appreciate it.

I am enjoying my newly sparked quest to finally figure this out, and all of the inputs I'm receiving during it. The books are great, you guys are (with the exceptions of Jonsey and Bruce) great, and I'm excited that there's finally some movement in my life on this, the issue of utmost importance.

by **Vitriola** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 8:27 pm

I think people can, and do, change, but never by volition. It takes something outside us to really change us, and unfortunately, it's usually something bad. What we do have control over is our attitudes, and we can change our attitudes. It takes waking up each and every morning, and deciding, who do I want to be? Who is the me that is waiting to come out? It involves having some goddamn faith in yourself that you're a good, kind, and decent person, which is the best any of us can be, and conducting our lives like we already were. I say conducting, because no matter what we're feeling inside, our characters are determined by what we do anyway. And, eventually, when you act like the person you want to be, you will become that person. You can't help it. Nobody gives you a cookie for doing the right thing when you want to, it's what you do when you might not want to, when things are stacked against you, when you're feeling out of sorts and down that matters. And then, well, you can at least like yourself. Even when you feel like crap.

by **Worm** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 8:12 pm

God, it's really a bitch when people on the internet are revealed to have emotions or mortality.

I always thought of it this way: I am. Changes in my persona ultimately result from my being. Thusly what I currently exist as has precedence over what I may change into or may have previously been. So if my existing happens to create a persona which I (I is like a subjective term here I guess) under the influences of said persona wish to exist under no more that is a suicidal persona; a way of thinking, living, and feeling that the individual can no longer bear and must destroy. I don't know if I ever was like that. I just feel like I've been me since about 14-15 and I'll probably be me for awhile longer until I'm someone else. So, I guess, I'm saying just exist and if you hate being something so much eventually you'll be something different. I think.

by **gsdgsd** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 7:13 pm

Debaser wrote:But happiness as a state of being? And categorically different from simple contentment? Any of you cats ever gotten in on that action?

For a period of time, yes. The hell of it is, you don't really realize it 'til it's over.

by **AArdvark** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 4:47 pm

And all this time I thought Knuckles WAS Jonsey....

He writes in a similar style.

THE
WELL SPIT UP DINNER
AND CALL ME A TAXI
AARDVARK

by **Roody_Yogurt** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 3:38 pm

Hahaha.

by **Knuckles the CLown** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 3:24 pm

Your wrong, money cures all problems. When I won the lottery in 92 it was BALLS! Unfortunatley I listened to my then neighbor Skeet Thomason and invested in Shopping Malls and Livestock. I tried to recoup my loses by buying wholesale cases of SEGA CD units to sell on the black market. Let's just say Shaker Heights High has 8,000 copies of Shadowrun buried in the north endzone.

by **pinback** » Thu Jul 08, 2004 3:21 pm

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:
pinback wrote:If given the choice between being funny, being non-boring, and being happy, I'd choose happiness.
Over funny??!!

Choose death.

Why? YOU haven't.

(OHhhh!!!)

Help.

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