The Pinback Files

[pinback]

Have you considered having your head frozen until such time as we can fix you up with a replacement body?

I have not!

Personally I'll be relieved when I'm a diamond, jesus christ how much of this life do I have to have.

If any of that is actually true, you need to fix that.

[Casual Observer]

Have you considered having your head frozen until such time as we can fix you up with a replacement body?

I have not!

Personally I'll be relieved when I'm a diamond, jesus christ how much of this life do I have to have.

If any of that is actually true, you need to fix that.

Thank you. Think wifey and I have settled that it would take a factory reset at this point, maybe an operating system fallback to last good known state.

[Tdarcos]

What a jackass.

I'm sorry, I was wrong. I should never have made any recommendations on things that people forget about. I'm sorry I even opened my mouth, err, I mean my keyboard. I am going to try very hard to not say anything about any subject other people are or could be interested in.

[Flack]

Both Paul and CO having pity parties in the middle of a guy's thread about having terminal cancer is the joltiest countriest thing ever.

[Jizaboz]

Both Paul and CO having pity parties in the middle of a guy's thread about having terminal cancer is the joltiest countriest thing ever.

ZINGER

[Tdarcos]

Both Paul and CO having pity parties in the middle of a guy's thread about having terminal cancer is the joltiest countriest thing ever.

I'm sorry you think that. I'm not having a pity party. Perhaps I should not have pointed out all the things people forget to do and their loved ones suffer as a result. Joe Robbie, made the Miami Dolphins into a serious, professional football team, and when he wanted a stadium for his team, built it with his own money, instead of going to the taxpayers for a bailout. Unfortunately, he died without a will. The failure to plan for his eventual death meant his family got raped by legal fees, taxes, and expenses. A will, and a few legal documents to correctly structure things would have saved them millions.

For most families it's nowhere near that important, but people, scared of their own mortality, often fail to make sure things are arranged to avoid unnecessary expense and trouble for those they leave behind. I've read too many horror stories about this sort of thing to not at least say something. But, apparently, I should have kept my mouth (keyboard) shut. I tried, I was a stupid idiot for doing so, and I shall endeavor to refrain from offering advice on any subject in the future. I'm not having a pity party, I'm just realizing I should have remembered, most people don't want advice and are hostile to it. I thought, however, given how serious this issue is that maybe it might help. But I see I was wrong, and I shouldn't have done it.

So just drop the subject, forget I said anything, and leave it alone, as I will now do.

[pinback]

So just drop the subject, forget I said anything, and leave it alone, as I will now do.

No, that's unacceptable. This has to be a "teachable moment" for you. You cannot do what you did. I mean, you can do it here, because we already all know you're a deranged lunatic with absolutely no sense of self- or social awareness, but just in case you run into other actual humans out in the wild.

When someone discloses that they are suffering from a terminal disease, or really any sad, unfortunate situation -- or, wait, let me expand that, ANY SITUATION AT ALL, that is not a cue for you to drop a giant TASK LIST on them of things that you think they should do about it, unless they ask.

That is not the way to behave, Paul.

[Casual Observer]

Both Paul and CO having pity parties in the middle of a guy's thread about having terminal cancer is the joltiest countriest thing ever.

Pretty sure its exactly what Ben would have wanted.

[AArdvark]

I never liked the Miami Dolphins anyway

[Da King]

Both Paul and CO having pity parties in the middle of a guy's thread about having terminal cancer is the joltiest countriest thing ever.

I love when other people say what I think.

BTW, this post would not exist if phpBB had the ability to "love" another post. It feels so 1998 in here.

[pinback]

I think I get it. You've made peace with it. You've seen the future, you accept it, and you can live without fear.

This is not quite right, but the truth is no less inspiring -- if much, much harder to explain.

"Making peace with it" implies a relationship between me and an unfortunate situation, a negotiation between the cold, hard facts and the person experiencing them. If the negotiation fails, the person drowns in suffering as his fate looms like the end of the world approaching from the horizon. If negotiation is successful, there may be a tenuous peace, a dignified resignation, a surrender. Much better than the alternative, but still requiring maintenance of that relationship.

Here, there is no negotiation, as that entire relationship simply does not appear. There is nothing to handle, nothing to deal with, nothing to make peace with. The entire scaffolding and the machinery that would keep it standing are simply... absent.

A glorious, timeless, infinite absence, requiring no negotiation, and fully clear of anything that could engage in such.

See? Hard to explain.

[Jizaboz]

Oh I think I get what you are saying quite clearly and it's a wonderful concept.

[pinback]

Had my first round (of five) of "radiation therapy" yesterday. The process is quick, easy and painless!

The several hours afterward are... Not.

My advice, try not to get cancer. Word to the wise.

[Flack]

Hopefully this slows the progress and works out.

[pinback]

An interesting development today at the JAMES, bitch. That guy says, the cancer is only in two vertebrae, nowhere else, so there is the possibility of surgically digging it out and replacing it with fake bones/rods, leaving me relatively clear.

Hmm.

I have a meeting with the surgeon next week to discuss it fully, but... Hmm.

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

I;ve got a fake rod for ya

[AArdvark]

Is it a cure or just a delaying tactic?

[Da King]

I;ve got a fake rod for ya

I'll toss in a fake bone.

[pinback]

Is it a cure or just a delaying tactic?

He tenuously floated the term "cure" out there, if everything goes to spec.

Then I talked with my radiation doctor today about the plan, and he said, well, the point of the radiation is to kill off the two tumors I got in there, and if it did its job, then there's nothing to remove with surgery.

So now it's like, am I dying or not? What the fuck is going on? This one's telling me I'm a goner, this other one's saying, nah, let's just kill 'em off, the other one's saying nah, let's just remove 'em.

It was all very clear when I was definitely on my way out, now I dunno what to think. Oh well, time for another Oxy.

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

If this all becomes a very unintentional but effective convoluted scheme to get you endless oxy, I'd consider that the best scenario.