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JC Chef · Post by **JC Chef** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 12:27 pm

Jolt Country Tasty Sweet Potato Pie

Ingredients:

1 pound sweet potatoes, peeled and cubed
1 1/4 cups plain yogurt
3/4 cup packed, dark brown sugar
1/2 teaspoon of cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon of nutmeg
5 egg yolks
Salt
1 (9-inch) deep dish, frozen pie shell
1 cup chopped pecans, toasted
1 tablespoon maple syrup

(Special Equipment: steamer basket)

Steps to Success:

Place cubed potatoes into steamer basket and place steamer basket into a large pot of simmering water that is no closer than 2 inches from the bottom of basket. Allow to steam for 20 minutes or until the potatoes are fork tender. Mash with potato masher and set aside.

(Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.)

Place sweet potatoes in the bowl of a stand mixer and beat with the paddle attachment. Add yogurt, brown sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, yolks, and salt (to taste), and beat until well combined. Pour this batter into the pie shell and place onto a sheet pan. Sprinkle pecans on top and drizzle with maple syrup.

Bake for 50 to 55 minutes. Remove from oven and cool. Keep refrigerated after cooling.

Vitriola · Post by **Vitriola** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 12:37 pm

Why does the steamer basket have to be so far away? I steam in a saucepan with one of those collapsable baskets, the legs of which are only about an inch from the bottom of the pan, and I fill it with about a half inch of water. Then put the lid on. Everything comes out perfect and crisp. What's the deal, you pretentious dipsuck?

Vitriola · Post by **Vitriola** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 12:43 pm

Also, you contentious pansy, why the fuck would you need a potato masher when you can just use a fork? Where is the POTATO MASHER under special equipment? Like, oh yeah, we all have one of those hanging around?

JC Chef · Post by **JC Chef** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 1:00 pm

Vitriola wrote:Why does the steamer basket have to be so far away? I steam in a saucepan with one of those collapsable baskets, the legs of which are only about an inch from the bottom of the pan, and I fill it with about a half inch of water.

A "collapsable basket" is perfectly expectable.

Vitriola wrote:What's the deal, you pretentious dipsuck?

Listen, don't spoil this base for the rest of us, okay?

JC Chef · Post by **JC Chef** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 1:06 pm

Vitriola wrote:Also, you contentious pansy, why the fuck would you need a potato masher when you can just use a fork? Where is the POTATO MASHER under special equipment? Like, oh yeah, we all have one of those hanging around?

Where's the Curry Expert when I need him?

Curry Expert · Post by **Curry Expert** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 1:25 pm

Believe me, I've got my fair share of experience with mashing potatoes. And I am perfectly aware of the school of thought that goes "a fork is just as effective as a special masher for the purpose of mashing potatoes".

I am also perfectly aware of the school of thought that goes, those people, and their predictably lumpy, grainy, disgusting potatoes should be piled into a trash compactor and squashed until the entire mess is a conformly smooth, fluffy paste. Add butter, salt to taste, serve.

Minimalism has its place in the kitchen, but not when the minimalization comes at the cost of a decent fucking bowl of mashed potatoes. Spend the extra $2 for a decent tool, you cheap sons of bitches.

Potato Ideal · Post by **Potato Ideal** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 1:35 pm

Listen to Curry Expert, and then save yourself the trouble by buying a box of instant potatoes. Texture is the trademark of homemade potatoes. If you want smooth mush in your mouth, have some chocolate mousse. You really want something in there with the feel of foam carpet cleaner? Leave the lumps, the skins, the soil from the earth! I'm one of those entities that like to feel like when I put a bite in my mouth, chew, and swallow it, that I've actually eaten something.

Curry Expert · Post by **Curry Expert** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 1:53 pm

Ah, wonderful. Another person who can't tell crap from quality. I'm positively nonplussed with amazement.

Here's a handy guide, to anyone considering making mashed potatoes for guests:

Anyone who can't tell the difference between "potato flakes" and properly whipped potatoes should not only be forcibly removed from your home, or any other decent establishment, but they should be flanked on both side by two burly gentlemen, one with large, squooshy, cottony-soft boxing gloves on his hands, and one with hard-spiked gloves with razors extending from the knunckles. Then both gentlemen should begin pummeling the no-taste waste of oxygen while you repeatedly ask them, "Can you tell the difference between THESE?"

i liek gloo · Post by **i liek gloo** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 1:55 pm

Curry Expert wrote:Anyone who can't tell the difference between "potato flakes" and properly whipped potatoes should not only be forcibly removed from your home, or any other decent establishment, but they should be flanked on both side by two burly gentlemen, one with large, squooshy, cottony-soft boxing gloves on his hands, and one with hard-spiked gloves with razors extending from the knunckles. Then both gentlemen should begin pummeling the no-taste waste of oxygen while you repeatedly ask them, "Can you tell the difference between THESE?"

i like glue best of all

*PS for Dinner

Curry Expert · Post by **Curry Expert** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 1:57 pm

This entire conversation is an affront to the fine art of food preparation. As is, I'm sure, most of the food prepared by those of you involved in it.

Thank You · Post by **Thank You** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 4:49 pm

Curry Expert is the best Gunbound vehicle.