One of Ben's funny screeds from 1995

[Tdarcos]

Newsgroups: dc.romance
From: pinback@access5.digex.net (Ben Parrish)
Date: 1995/05/30
Subject: The Worst Personals Ever...


This group is home to some of the most embarassing personal ads I've ever seen. Jesus Christ, people, you don't have to pay by the *line* here. It's FREE. Say something interesting, huh?

Hi, 24 year old white male, shy, sensitive, looking for companion for a few chuckles, or maybe more. I'm a nonsmoker, and I love to dance and go to movies and stuff spaghetti down my face as fast as I-

What IS this? This is the best you can do? "Hi, I'm an un-person."

I wanna see some really GOOD personals on here pretty goddamn soon, I'll tell you that. I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore.

I'd write one that would make all the ladies swoon and make all the men instantly turn gay, but so far I haven't seen anyone on this group that I'm particularly ISO. If you know what I mean.

Well, except for John Martin, but I doubt he'd have me.

[ pinback@access.digex.net ... Ben Parrish ]
[ hi im a shy sensitive white mal lokigbn fpo a ncioe copmeranioarnogj[ gi9rohfgujs-09qh0 qc9

Actually, Ben was just as mean spirited (some people thoutght so, including me) back 15 years ago as he is now. Read the whole thread off Google Newsgroups:

http://groups.google.com/group/dc.roman ... %22&lnk=ol&#