Arms Dealer: The Thread Where I Attempt To Make A Penny

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So fifteen years after it was released, I find myself once again completely addicted to and obsessed with Counter-Strike. It fills basically every free moment of my days now, and several non-free moments.

There've been a few tweaks to gameplay since it first came out -- a couple different grenade types, a couple of the guns replaced with other guns, and a couple graphics upgrades, but it's still essentially the exact same game that came out has a Half-Life mod in 1999. Same "Ts" and "CTs" battling it out, three minutes at a time, ten bazillion times in a row. Those kids will never get along.

The one thing that HAS changed, however, is that there is now an entire marketplace, an entire economy, based on buying and selling Counter-Strike guns on the Steam marketplace.

Okay, fine.

But here's the amazing part:

These "guns" are just skins, paintjobs for the guns that are already in the game, and that you already have access to as soon as you install the game. They do not affect the gameplay even a tiny, tiny bit.

Some of these "guns" (and particularly "knives") fetch hundreds of dollars.

For a paintjob for a fake weapon that you already get for free.

This is INCREDIBLE to me. I still can't believe it.

But as the old saying goes, if you can't beat 'em, try to make one U.S. penny by joining them.

So this is the thread where we wipe the slate clean (I've already bought a few of these "guns" for 10-20 cents, just to see what it's like) roll back to zero, and see if we can actually make a real-world profit from this nonsense.

A one cent profit is the goal, and will make this entire escapade a rousing success.

Let's begin.

I purchased a "M4A1S Nitro (Field Tested)" for $2.48. Oh yes, I forgot. Not only are these all just paintjobs for fake, free guns, there are also different levels of "wear" for all of the paintjobs. So "Field Tested" will have more "wear" than, say, "Factory New", but will have less "wear" than "Battle-Scarred". Again, the difference here is that someone MSPaint spray-painted a little extra gray over the Battle-Scarred version. Of course, the less wear, the more REAL-LIFE MONEY THAT PEOPLE ARE SPENDING ON THIS SHIT it is worth. How do the kids say it? "smh", I believe. SMH, INDEED.

At any rate, I immediately put that same "M4A1S Nitro (Field Tested)" back on the market, at a price that would net me $2.49.

Oh, but here's the other thing. This whole thing is a utter and complete racket. Why? Because for every sale, Steam takes 5% of the price, and the Counter-Strike people take 10%. So for every dollar spent on this shit, 15 cents of it is nicked off the top and sent to Gaben and his merry band.

So, whereas I purchased it for $2.48, the seller only got $2.17. And whereas I'm trying to sell it to make $2.49, the actual price the buyer would have to pay is like $2.83.

It seems like a lost cause. BUT, this particular gun has been going UP in value (there's charts for this, since of course this is serious business, and not just Gaben stuffing his fat fucking mouth with your cash).

So we'll see.

We'll see.

I can't believe this exists.

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Alright, at the same time, let's try it with a super-cheap gun to see if that might work better.

Purchased a SG 553 Army Sheen (Factory New) for 6 cents, of which the seller gets 4 cents and Gaben gets 2.

Put it on sale for 9 cents, of which I'd get 7.

Seems unlikely someone would pay 9 cents for something that you can easily get for 6 or 7 cents, but none of the rest of this makes any sense, so why does THIS have to make sense?

Oh, by the way. One of the other way to get "guns" other than buying them is that occasionally in the game you will randomly be given a "case".

The case itself is worth about 5 cents on the marketplace, but if you have a "key", you can open the case and randomly get one of the items possible for that case type. Usually it'll be a cheapo skin, for ten cents or whatever. But every once in a while you'll luck into a rare/special item, which of course can go for much, much more.

The keys themselves cost $2.49.

So it is a very real, yet very subtle, form of gambling. The $2.49 is likely going to be much more than the value of what you get for it, BUT you could hit the jackpot and get a knife worth hundreds.

This is going on. Right now. Thousands of these things happening every minute.

This is something that happens.

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I have taken the "M4A1S Nitro (Field Tested)" off the market, because nobody is every going to buy it at that price, and it does look kind of cool, and I use that gun a lot, so whatever.

WHATEVER, man.

[AArdvark]

Back when I played Medal of Honor there were lots of gun skins available for free. Now people are buying them with real money....weird.



THE
NO CLEAR ADVANTAGE
AARDVARK

[Ice Cream Jonsey]

Wait, Pinner! You sent me a mail and you made fourteen cents!

That's your ticket out of this dump!

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That was good, but that was just selling an item I "earned" in the game itself.

My actual goal was to see if it was possible to make money off of this shit without ever actually playing the game.

(So far: no.)