Jolt Country

Vitriola wrote:

It was on purpose. It was on purpose because I couldn't think of her real name, my drunken spree in Brazil aside, and figured everyone would know who I meant. I don't need persona identification to appeal to clasic gamers; I'm breathing, and that's all that seems to matter.

Due to the fact that this has become a race against time to get to the end of all the unread postsa before my time is up, 11 minutes and counting, I'll make this short and sweet.

So breathing is what you....ACK! NO NOT THE BAT! ::THUNK:: Please not again Jonsey! ::THWAK:: ::KERSPLAT!

He's still not learning...

I really dont like to drink.

Vitriola wrote:. . . I'm breathing, and that's all that seems to matter.

yep, 'is she breathing' is pretty much the only criteria i have for women i'll date. usually.

Did we ever decide on an Official JC Adult Beverage?

Jolt Cola and Gin? Jolt Cola and Jack? Jolt Cola and Jolt Cola?

I don't know exactly what the best beverage would be. I do have to make Jello Shots for the first time in my life by Friday, however. Anyone have any pointers for a rookie?

Jello Shooters

• 1. With the help of a grown-up, cut open a small package of any flavor jello and pour into a bowl.
  
  2. Pour in 1 Cup boiling water.
  
  3. Stir to dissolve.
  
  4. Let cool to room temperature.
  
  5. Add 1 Cup of Ketel One Vodka.
  
  6. Pour into mold or pan or small cups.
  
  7. Freeze until firm (the Jello).
  
  8. Cut into individual servings (unless you went the cup route) (or do, I don't care, they're not my shooters).

It's Ketel One vodka (crap that's one freaky load graphic), and that reminds me of something interesting. I bartended for awhile in California, and when it was slow, sometimes I'd read the backs of the bottles for interesting things about the processes, etc. On the back of the Ketel One vodka (a high-end Dutch vodka), they told about how it was and is and always will be a family owned and run operation, and they had the lifespans of each of their ancestry. You can find it in that link if you click on tradition and go through the spiel. Anyway, I just happened to notice how many of the guys either died in their early 40s, or early 60s. A couple lived to an old age, but most...did not. Enough that I always wondered if maybe they were hastened to their departures earlier than planned.

Wow, it keeps getting more and more sad in here.

But again, please keep it up boys, your complete absense of logic and, oh yes, humor is so much fun to read. You're all just floundering, and it's deadly obvious even you, a bunch of very very dense men, that you realize it.


Only the Sweetest,

Molly Muffsweet

I am far too high profile and running with stars to enter TWO posts. This is a ... reply-o-rama!

Vitriola wrote:Enough that I always wondered if maybe they were hastened to their departures earlier than planned.

1. Hey, V, tell that story you told me about the Scotch, where they invite you to a party at the end of the year if you buy it and so forth. I am trying to recall details but I CANNOT. And that... can't happen!

2. The last slow period I remember was back in like November of 2002. What got us out of the funk was talking about alcohol. It broadened our horizons and got the posts going again. I will endeavor to make the Drunk Holding Tank be the best base it can possibly be, but that's not going to happen without the lot of us lushes clearing our heads for a moment and scribbling down advice and pointers.

3. As some of you might remember, I went to a Halloween party last year. I was done in about two and a half to three hours not because I drank a bottle of Mad Dog, but because I drank a bottle of that sweet nectar, downed a lot of Jello Shots, and had a bunch of beers as well. Well, the true people who suck at history are doomed to repeat it, and I'm headed back there on Friday for Year Two. It's sort of like the graphic novel "Batman: Year Two" except rather than get a teen sidekick that won't go away I get a rabid, radioactive-green, canine based one.

JC Reader Vitriola has thoughtfully offered to be the "designated" driver, which puts her in a different breed from the other drivers who will probably be there and that are, as I like to call them, the "drunk" drivers. Much better, that. She has never seen me as intoxicated with the idea of intoxication as I am right now with the thoughts of this Friday party. Where I am from, we work hard. Plenty hard! But we play hard as well. On Friday, not only will the bunch of us be doing all that, but we'll be consuming tasty Jello like the world is about to run out of sanded-down bone.

Molly Muffsweet wrote:But again, please keep it up boys, your complete absense of logic and, oh yes, humor is so much fun to read.

Where was the lack of logic in this thread, you me-obsessed garbage cunt?

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:I1. Hey, V, tell that story you told me about the Scotch, where they invite you to a party at the end of the year if you buy it and so forth. I am trying to recall details but I CANNOT. And that... can't happen!

I was wrong, it was a cognac. I tried alot of things that day...

I worked at a classy, high-end restaurant/banquet hall in Atlanta called Villa Christina. Great food. Anyway, they had a liquor distributor come through with a bunch of scotchs and cognacs. I won't go into how hilariously funny it was to everyone else that their bartender had to be taught how to drink scotch after she made the scotchface upon first taste (it truly makes a difference how you drink it), but one of the cognacs we got to sample was this company's answer to Louis XIV, called Kelt Petra. They trained us how to display it and serve it. It came in a mahogany box. You brought the box to the guest, and laid it in front of him. The box opened exactly like a sci-fi spaceship; it was a levered flap that hinged down and created a walkway down to the table. You brought out the bottle (it did not walk down itself and demand to be taken to your leader, sadly). You had to hold it more carefully than Vanna White would hold a Faberge egg. You poured a very, very measured shot into an expensive snifter. You then got the customer to sign what looked like a leather-bound checkbook. When the establishment had sold the whole bottle, the book was sent back to the company, where the owner of the company would hand-write out a thank you on expensive paper, along with a personal invitation to dine with him, should you ever be in France. You then charged the client $120 for this shot. This cognac did what they call a 'tour of the world'. It was first casked back 80 years ago. It was stored. It was then sent on a ship around by the Arctic Circle, so the casks could absorb the salty air, which mellowed and embettered the brew. I got to try it. I hate cognacs. I didn't like this one, either. But the looks of rapture on everyone else's face at the 'smoothness' and 'waft' of it made me feel rather left out. I'm just a scotch girl at heart, I guess.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:I am far too high profile and running with stars

Hey, ICJ, you have an extra "profile" in there, and you misspelt "scissors" as "stars."

HTH!
Bruce

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Where was the lack of logic in this thread, you me-obsessed garbage cunt?

Remember, you liked me, Jonesy. You told me yourself, right before you asked to take a picture with me.

It's really sad, in the sense that you're a big fan of everything I've done, and it wasn't until I called you on making an unfunny review over at Trotting Krips that you started to turn like a retarded kid who's security blanket was taken away.

But keep it up, it's cute seeing you struggle to say something funny. Cute and sad.


Only the Sweetest,

Molly Muffsweet

Molly Muffsweet wrote:

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:Where was the lack of logic in this thread, you me-obsessed garbage cunt?

Remember, you liked me, Jonesy. You told me yourself, right before you asked to take a picture with me.

[/quote]

I don't remember any of this. Suffice it to say, this never happened as far as I can recall. More details, please.

It's really sad, in the sense that you're a big fan of everything I've done, and it wasn't until I called you on making an unfunny review over at Trotting Krips that you started to turn like a retarded kid who's security blanket was taken away.

You never posted on the old Krips board. You just can't make shit up.

I always presumed you were fake, because only the fake girls on here do not want to take me home for an evening and ride me up and down all night like a pogo stick. Everyone else I test rather well with when it comes to JC Reader Satisfaction: Female Populace.

I see someone in need of ego deflation

erm Game

Robb won the Weekend Mission, if it is indeed a contest. If not, he probably thinks he won, anyway.
In other news, my Drunk Game is almost ready; there will be no testing. It will be released so bad that it makes Enter The Matrix look like C&C, and E.T. look like, err, Well, no, I don't think I can go that far.

Ice Cream Jonsey wrote:I don't know exactly what the best beverage would be. I do have to make Jello Shots for the first time in my life by Friday, however. Anyone have any pointers for a rookie?

What, you've never made Jello shots before?

Update: Grey goose is UBER
ketel one - OK, but for the price it's not

Still want to try that Tanqueray vodka. Yes, I said vodka.

Jack Straw wrote:Update: Grey goose is UBER
ketel one - OK, but for the price it's not

Still want to try that Tanqueray vodka. Yes, I said vodka.

Ditto on the Tankuray. I'm intrigued. Their gin is top, but vodker??

Grey goose is yummy. Ketel One, I'm a huge fan of. Agreed, overpriced in the store, though. But it's like water, with a kick.

For the price (Smirnoff range, maybe a dollar or two more), I'm a big fan of Fris vodka (drinking a vodka & soda right now, in fact). It's scandahoovian, but pretty decent. Hard to find, though, at least in your smaller-than-better liquor stores.

But, when I'm just drinkin' vodka tonics or vodka sodas, anything is fine, and indeed you might as well go with the cheapies, since you're just watering it down anyway. But for vodka martinis, ya gotta go top shelf.

You should try Tanqueray Malacca Gin. Very earthy and smooth, I like it better than Sapphire. My favorite is a Malacca Gimlit, very easy on the lime (just a drop or even less is good).


http://www.alcoholreviews.com/SPIRITS/malacca.html